Start the New Year right

'...forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another...' Colossians 3:13 NIV

To start the New Year right, you must let go of any old grudges that are weighing you down. Philip Yancey describes forgiveness as an unnatural act and says, 'You don't find dolphins forgiving sharks for eating their playmates. It's a dog-eat-dog world...not a dog-forgive-dog world.' Bitterness comes naturally when you've been hurt, whereas forgiving is supernatural and requires God's enabling grace. But remember, Jesus said, 'If you do not forgive...your Father will not forgive your sins' (Matthew 6:15 NIV).

Humanly speaking, there is not one single reason God should forgive your sins, yet the offences He pardons you for every day far outweigh anything you will ever be asked to forgive others for. By forgiving, you change the whole dynamic. You open the door of a prison where you are both prisoner and jailer, setting yourself and the other person free. Grudges not only isolate you from people who were once friends, they actually shorten your life by producing deadly enzymes that contribute to a host of physical ailments. One man told his counsellor, 'I wish my brother could come to my wedding, but we haven't spoken in years.' The counsellor asked, 'How come?' Pausing, the man replied, 'It sounds ridiculous now, but I don't even remember.' Drifting apart is the natural result of an unforgiving spirit; forgiveness reverses the trend by restoring and healing broken relationships.

It's a medical certainty that forgiveness adds years to your life. As a rule, when you talk to people who've passed the eighty-year mark you find they are at peace with themselves - because they've learned to forgive and let go.

That is a fantastic one to end the year on.

I was very grateful to Mother Nature yesterday when the New Year festivities down at Mount Maunganui were cancelled due to poor weather. Nicole and her friends were wanting me to take them down there for the night, and i didn't want to. She was very moody with me over this issue, but if i am going to be stuck inside because of the rain, i would prefer to be stuck inside my own home for free - rather than spending money on petrol and being stuck inside someone else's home. I also did not like the thought of my 16 year old daughter out on that beach in the rain on New Year's Eve.

All arguments regarding this issue were off once the BOP Times reported that New Years at The Mount had been cancelled so  - THANK YOU MOTHER NATURE.

Now, at least i get to sit in the comfort of my own home and worry about her out at a party all night, tonight.

Speaking of forgiveness. I ran into Fred at the local supermarket a few weeks ago. She was looking down at her phone or something as i walked past her, and i nearly did just keep walking. It took a good ten seconds (which is a long time when you are walking past someone) to decide whether or not to say hello - but i did. We had a little chat, and she told me about her and my step father's trip to Boise to visit my sister in November. Then we said bye, and i carried on to do my shopping.

This afternoon i have phoned her and asked if her and my stepfather feel like getting together for a BBQ.

T is going to get to meet my mother this New Years Eve.

Wish me luck. My sister made sure that the ink on her marriage certificate was dry before her husband - Tim - was allowed to meet my mum!

Forgiveness - that is how i am ending 2011.

Happy New Year you lot. Thank you to everyone who made my 2011 such a wonderful year. Stay safe out there in this wild weather, and lets all hope those Mayan people got it wrong!

New Years Honours List Ommission - Matt Bowden

Matt Bowden - a living, breathing advertisement for why you should never take his product. Or any other drugs for that matter.

Kronic will make you think that a facial peal, hair extensions, eye liner and having no chin will turn you into Ziggy Stardust.

Kronic campaigner now pushing glam rock

Perhaps the flak hasn't been quite as heated, but Matt Bowden's latest venture still has some members of the public up in arms.

"Click on Matt's YouTube link to see his latest single Higher," writes one hater online. "It makes Friday by Rebecca Black look like Mozart."

The Higher clip is one of Bowden's psychedelic rock music videos.

The 40-year-old has turned much of his attention to launching the career of his rock alter ego Starboy since Kronic and other synthetic cannabis products were banned in August.

An "immersive theatrical rock partyshow" at Auckland's Viaduct Events Centre had to be postponed this month after a lack of ticket sales and apparent consent problems.

But Bowden insists Starboy is still on track.

"So many people wanted to come to it, who couldn't, simply because they had a prior engagement with Santa Claus."

He says that when an acrobatic abseiler plunged 20m off a building in Aotea Square this month, a council review of safety procedures and consents put his show in doubt.

"We had a lot of acrobats coming out of the ceiling, and a lot of flying happening ... and [the council] couldn't give us an answer until 48 hours before showtime."

Over eggs benedict at a North Shore cafe, Bowden explains his dream is to tour his show through Asia and Europe.

"I guess maybe I'm the only person who thinks that glam rock can make a comeback. But I'm willing to try.

"In a sense I am doing it tongue-in-cheek, and becoming a rock star ... You're going to be taking the piss really, you've got to have a sense of humour."

But he admits that given his role as de facto spokesman for the legal-high industry in New Zealand, Starboy's fanbase will lie predominantly offshore.

"My market has to be overseas now, because in New Zealand the public don't like it if you've changed from one thing to something else."

When Bowden lobbied for the party pill industry before the BZP ban in 2008 he often wore a suit and a short-back-and-sides haircut to go with it.

He now wears his hair long and makes no effort to look like a nine to fiver - something he says probably hurt his credibility with some sections of society when he fronted for synthetic cannabis.

"But I don't really care. You get to the point where you're pretty hardnosed. It was tough, people saying, 'I'm going to smash you, I'm going to kill you if I see you'.

"I had death threats ... it's kind of nasty. Is that because of the eyeliner, is that the issue? Or is it the hair?"

And the threats haven't worked - Bowden still talks articulately and passionately about drug reform, and predicts the return of legal highs to New Zealand.

Although smoking products like Kronic cannot be proven safe, other legal highs will triumph over what he says is a completely futile war on drugs.

The review of the Misuse of Drugs Act and the establishment of a new regulatory body next year will see New Zealand to the fore of drug reform, he says.

"New Zealand will lead with a pragmatic, regulatory model. Other countries will follow suit. And when we've got three or four countries, then we take it to the UN level."

But didn't the rollout of Kronic - now helping to fund Starboy - into dairies, many next to schools, damage the argument for legalising similar products?

"It was messy in the same way that road works are messy," Bowden counters.

"You get a result at the end of it ... It was pretty clear that regulation was needed. That's what you should be able to see there - that regulation was required."

And if Starboy does sell-out stadiums across the globe, that message will be carried through his music.

"I'll always be a freedom fighter ... I see it as the role of the artist, which is to stimulate creative thought - to progress policy and mankind."

Move over Graham Henry, Richie McCaw, and Dan Carter - New Zealand has a new hero.

This guy has been putting on rock concerts for the aurally and visually impaired at his own expense. Is there nothing this renaissance man can't do?

Hundreds of thousands of New Zealanders have been deprived the freedom to experience Starboy due to the Council's small mindedness over petty acrobatic and pyrotechnic issues.

So what if a few people have to die to see this freedom fighter?

First they outlawed his drugs - now this.

But don't worry - history tells us that all great ideas were initially suppressed. Leonardo Da Vinci's helicopter never did make it off the ground.

Keep trying Matt - don't let anyone tell you that drug taking and dealing does not make you a freedom fighter. You are not alone in these dark times. Look at all the good work Larry Flint has done for the emancipation of women and the First Amendment.

I hear there is still a place for you on the 2012 Honours list.

No rugby playing boofheads need apply.




T just left the room muttering something about a Toy World guitar and losing the will to live.

Ew - Coincidence? - Probably not!

Warning after nude men seen watching young girls

Nude men have been stepping out of bounds at a Northland beach.

The beach and dunes more than 200m south of the Department of Conservation (DOC) campground at Uretiti have long been a safe haven for people who prefer an all-over tan.

But some men have been walking naked along the southern boundary of the campground or stripping off in the public day area north of it.

Campground manager Kevin McCleary said naked men had been found watching young girls or swimming near children on the beach in front of the campground.

Uretiti campground just happens to be where a whole commune of NZDaters are camping right now.

Why does it not surprise me that those desperados would have chosen a place where it is considered normal to chase people around the beach with their wangers out, to spend their New Years?

NZDating - Do. NOT. Go. There.

Mr McCleary wants visitors to enjoy the beach without naked men causing offence.

Phew -  that is a relief.

Naked men are the least of Mr McCleary's worries with those freaks up there. The underbelly of New Zealand society has descended on their nudie campground!

Migraines

Ugh.

I used to get migraines very regularly - every couple of months. They started around the time i turned 13 and made a regular appearance in my life until around the age of twenty. Then they just magically stopped. I have no idea what caused them to start, or what caused them to stop - but i certainly was not complaining when they did.

Last year while on a long road trip, that all too familiar rainbow coloured wiggly thing in my vision returned after a 20 year absence. I was lucky though - i was with someone who knew all about migraines. We quickly pulled over at the nearest pharmacy and he bought me a miracle cure. I say miracle cure because it seemed like that at the time. It was only some extra strength Panadol or something but whatever it was - the wiggles disappeared and i escaped the feeling of a knife going through my brain and the subsequent vomiting that pain causes.

Today though, i was not so lucky. I had just dropped Nicole off at the local mall to shop with her friends, and had plonked myself down in front of the laptop. I read an email and as i read it - the wiggles returned. I ran around the house searching for Panadol and all i found were empty packets in every room.

T and his tribe were at their place. I struggled to move to the bathroom let alone to the nearest pharmacy. I was home alone with a migraine and no one to bring me painkillers or look after me! T offered to come over but that would have meant bringing his angels with him. They are little angels but they are noisy angels and my knife skewered brain could not handle any light - let alone noise.

I have spent the day with a bucket next to my bed, a wash clothe on my head, the curtains drawn, all alone with no one to help me if i needed to move.

I realise that unless you suffer from migraines you will have no idea how bad this day was for me. If you do suffer from migraines then reading this has probably been bad enough to cause the wiggles in your own eyes.

All i could think today, while my head was in that bucket was;

Waaaaaaaa where is my stepmother when i need her?!?!?!

Migraines remind me of how much i love her. She was always there for me, leaving work and picking me up from school straight away, holding my hair and rubbing my back as i threw up, making sure i was ok and had everything i needed - through every single one of those migraines that i had as a teenager.

I love you Monica. Today - reminded me of one of the reasons why.

022 087 2908

Text bullying is still alive and well in Auckland - I had thought that was so last decade.

The owner of the above phone number has been texting me and harrassing me this afternoon.

He has made it clear that he knows my address and is happy to come to my home.

Feel free to text him.

He likes oysters and talking dirty.

And he is so lonely. :(

Pre pay phone numbers should be illegal - although he did finally answer after T made several attempts to phone him. He denied all knowledge of any texts being sent to me - then proceeded to text me again to tell me my "boyfriend" had just phoned him.

Loser. Stupid loser. Hopefully his stupidity at least cost him a new SIM card to change his loser pre pay number.

If anyone knows who this number belongs to - i would love to know.

Too tired to blog

I have had the most wonderful few days, and now i am absolutely exhausted.

We had a fantastic time at the races today. I have never been to the Boxing Day races at Ellerslie before. The last time i had been to the races at all was Melbourne Cup Day in 1993 with Anni.

It was a little bit sad being reminded of that day today, but besides that we had so much fun. I had a ton of fun watching the T bet his little amounts of money on horses, and get all excited about the outcome. He even won one of his bets and scored three dollars and ninety cents!

I did not spend any money betting on horses. Watching all the fashion statements crime was enough entertainment for me for one day.

Fashion Crime at the Ellerslie Races
I can think of only one place where these would be appropriate!

I can't wait til our next Boxing Day, to do it all again.

That is about all that i have the energy to write tonight.

Happy Birthday T.

39 more to go!



zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Boxing Day A-Hole

This is my neighbour - AT 6AM THIS MORNING!!!



After a super duper tiring and busy 48 hours of cooking, socialising, playing with kids, and cleaning up after those kids - my exhausted self was looking forward to a nice sleep in before heading to the races today with the T and his tribe to celebrate his birthday.

NO SLEEP IN FOR ME.

BLOGGING REVENGE TIME on this Bucklands Beach Road resider!

Who does this at 6am on ANY day? Let alone Boxing Day?!??!

I need some grumpiness antidote - STAT.

I will write about my wonderful Christmas when i get over having such a *sshole for a neighbour.

Back on the P

eas!!!

Check them out!

My pea harvest - just in time for Christmas dinner!

Just finished the last of my Christmas shopping...

I have one thing to say;

Thank God i no longer have to budget for booze!!!

There was a time - when Danny and i were together - that the thought of the shops being closed for 24 hours and running out of booze stressed me / us out enough to invest in whole cases of wine and multiple boxes of beer. I cringe when i think of the money we wasted.

All that money - just to get drunk and end up fighting.

Thank GOD those days are gone!

Last of the shopping done. The turkey is in the oven. The Christmas movies are waiting to be played. The stockings are hanging by the fireplace and ready to be stuffed. The beans and peas are waiting to be picked from my garden.

Merry Christmas Eve you lot!

"Christmas is forever, not for just one day, for loving, sharing, giving, are not to put away like bells and lights and tinsel, in some box upon a shelf. The good you do for others is good you do yourself." ~ Norman Wesley Brooks

I forgot mistletoe! But that is ok - i get lots of kisses all the time anyway.

The Truth of the Virgin Birth

'The virgin will...give birth to a son...' Matthew 1:23 NIV

Heaven announced the birth of Jesus in these words: 'The virgin will...give birth to a son, and...call Him Immanuel - which means, 'God with us.' Isn't it ironic that the first people to question the miracle of the virgin birth were religious leaders? The Pharisees said to Jesus, 'We were not born of fornication...' (John 8:41 NKJV). Their insinuation was clear and cruel. After all, Jesus couldn't point to Joseph and say, 'He's my father.'

Understand this: Jesus had to be man in order to die, and He had to be God in order to save. You were the child of an earthly father, so you were 'born in sin'. But Jesus was the child of a heavenly Father, so He broke the genetic cycle of sin before He was born. In the Old Testament a sacrificial lamb had to be without blemish (birth defect) or spot (something picked up along the way). Since Jesus had neither inherited sin nor practiced sin, He qualifies as '...the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world' (John 1:29 NAS).

The virgin birth is true because: (a) The angel of the Lord announced it (Matthew 1:20); (b) Mary's husband-to-be accepted it (Matthew 1:24); (c) Elizabeth, her cousin, received it by divine revelation (Luke 1:41-42); (d) The story was written by a well respected medical doctor who knew the character of all concerned: '...since I myself have carefully investigated everything from the beginning, it seemed good also to me to write an orderly account for you...that you may know the certainty of the things you have been taught' (Luke 1:3-4 NIV).

Christmas Eve. Wow.

Another year nearly gone, and this year was a big one. I can't believe how fast it has gone, or how much can change in a year. It seems like just yesterday i was sitting here writing about 2010 and how it had been the happiest year of my life but how Christmas time and the holidays depressed me - how i just wanted to go to bed, wake up and have it be 2011.

Other than the fact that i could totally not afford Christmas this year, and am broker than a really broke thing - there is nothing about it that i have not looked forward to this year. I am not wishing it away, or wanting to sleep through it this year. There is absolutely nothing lonely about this Christmas for me. If anything, i have too many people to spend it with!

I have to get up and get moving. Billy is working a 12 hour shift today - oh the joys of retail! - and i have to drop him off there shortly.

I have a batch of chocolate chip cookies to bake - you know - to leave out for Santa with a glass of milk tonight, like i did every year as a kid. It is fun now that my own children are grown, to be forcing my childhood Christmas traditions on the T's tribe! They will also be forced to hang out with me tonight and watch the likes of  Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, Charles Dickens'  A Christmas Carol, and A Charlie Brown Christmas and all those other cheesy kid's Christmas movies that i used to watch every year. They won't be complaining about an early night - that is for sure. They will leave cookies and a glass of milk out for Santa before bed - and wake up to an empty glass and crumbs - just like i did every year.

Tomorrow - for the first time in like 18 years - i am going to join Billy and spend some time celebrating with his Dad's side of the family. I have not been involved in their Christmas celebrations since his Dad and i separated when he was a toddler. So instead of just dropping him off and picking him up - i am going to spend some time with them and be part of their family again. It is amazing how a tragedy like Ricci's death can bring people that have drifted apart closer together again, and make you realise how important some people are to you - even after neglecting those relationships for so many years.

First though - i have a turkey dinner for tonight to prepare, and a big huge fat breakfast and presents with T and the kids in the morning.

I still need to get stocking stuffers for SIX kids as well.

Best i get this sheepskin rug fixed - and my butt moving - like half an hour ago. I might not have any money this Christmas but i have more people around me that i love than i have hours in the day to spend with them all - and that makes me richer than i have ever been.

I. Am. Blessed.

Don't Be Afraid of Failure - 4

'A righteous man may fall seven times and rise again...' Proverbs 24:16 NKJV

Solomon writes: 'Without oxen a stable stays clean, but you need a strong ox for a large harvest' (Proverbs 14:4 NLT). If you insist on always having a nice neat stall, you'll have an empty stall. If you want a big harvest, you'll need a big ox with a big appetite who creates big messes. For example, if you decide to have children you'll have lots of joy, and lots of messes to clean up. Within minutes, children can take a house that looks like it belongs in Better Homes and Gardens and make it look like a trial run for the battle of Armageddon. So you've an option: live by yourself and enjoy a less complicated life, or accept the problems that come with having a family. Even in the dictionary, the words striving and struggle come before the word success.

Dr. John Maxwell says, 'At some point you have to make a transition from believer of the dream, to buyer of the dream. No dream comes true without somebody paying for it.' And part of the price you will have to pay is in learning from the mistakes you make. You can attend every success seminar, read every success manual and follow every success mentor, but the price must always be paid in messes and mistakes.

There isn't a single person in the world who has achieved anything without paying a price for it. Some pay with their lives or their freedom. Others pay by giving up options or finances or relationships. But one way or another, everybody pays.

I have had a very unproductive day today. I have felt tired and lethargic so have gotten absolutely nothing that i had planned on doing - done.

I am a very lucky mum tonight though. My son and daughter are taking me out to the movies and dinner for my Christmas present.

Best i get my lazy butt moving. It is not very often that i get totally spoiled by my kids - unless you count them being straight A well behaved geniuses being spoiled! ;)

I am not going to tell them that i actually feel like continuing to blob out in my track suit pants with my sheepskin rug on top of my head - and not moving for the next week.

This is going to be good. Unlike most of the rest of the world's population i actually LOVE Sarah Jessica Parker, and have ever since i was like an 11 year old with a totally different head and first saw her on Square Pegs. ;)

Oh yeah - and judging from the smell in my bedroom right now - it is time to get Nixon's anal glands drained again.

Kill. Me. Now. 

Do You Recognise The South Auckland Grinch?

Via Whale Oil

This woman was caught on security camera at Woodlyn Drive, Karaka, South Auckland after allegedly robbing a home and taking all of the owner's Christmas presents at approximately 12:30pm yesterday.

She was apparently the lookout for about 5 men who burgled a home while driving a stolen Subaru. This is not the first robbery in the area. It is one of many in a spate over recent weeks.

Please contact the Police or Andrew Burns if you recognise this low life scum bag.

Cheers.

Bye Bye Occupy Auckland

Occupy Auckland loses legal bid to stay in square

Occupy Auckland protesters are set to march on the town hall after having their legal bid to stay at their Aotea Square campground declined.

An Auckland District Court judge yesterday ordered Occupy Auckland protestors to pack up and leave Aotea Square within 48 hours.

The movement's request for a stay on that judgment was turned down this afternoon, meaning protestors have a day to leave the site.

A post on the Occupy Auckland facebook wall announced plans for a "symbolic occupation" of the Auckland town hall in the wake of the hearing.

Protesters were planning to march on the hall at 4pm.

The protesters have to secretly be happy with this decision. I can't imagine that Christmas dinner from their make-shift kitchen would have been all that tasty, and i doubt all of their friends and families would want to join them with Auckland's homeless - hanging out in the city on Christmas Day. .

Even the most stringent of attention spans would have to be bored sitting around that place all day - every day - and must secretly be relieved to be able to go home without appearing to let the side down.

Go on Occupiers - go home and enjoy a turkey dinner.  We got your message and agreed with it 2 months ago, but we are still sitting here wondering how you expected anything to change while sitting on your butts holding up signs.

Don't Be Afraid of Failure - 3

'A righteous man may fall seven times and rise again...' Proverbs 24:16 NKJV

The Psalmist wrote: 'Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep Your Word' (Psalm 119:67 NKJV). By doing it the wrong way, he eventually learned to do it the right way. The truth is, when you fail in one area, it can drive you to explore other areas. Most of life's successes are based on the principle of trial and error. Often failure is not falling short of your goal, it's simply not making the effort. Failure can actually help you discover your area of success. For example, when you hate your job you will likely fail in it. Yet it's in losing that hated position that you may be pressed to pursue what you really like to do, and are called to do.

Another benefit of failure is that it makes you less judgmental of others. When you've experienced failure you become more sympathetic. Instead of pointing an accusing finger, you see the need to extend a helping hand. Instead of saying foolish things like, 'I can't believe you did that,' you remember the pit God dug you out of and say with gratitude and humility, 'Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.' You know how it hurts to fail, and you feel their pain because of what you've been through. This makes you a better friend, a better mentor and a better example of grace.

Jesus told Peter: '...Satan has asked for you, that he may sift you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, that your faith should not fail; and when you have returned to Me, strengthen your brethren' (Luke 22:31-32 NKJV).

I had to have a bit of a laugh to myself when i read this status on Facebook just now;

The T and i got up early this morning to head out and do the last of our Christmas shopping. I have already bought most of what i needed to buy. Money is tight so my shopping list was not all that big. The T had not even started on his shopping yet and was planning on doing it all in one go - today.

We were both feeling a bit tense at the thought of having to go out and purchase presents. We disagree on what is value for money - sorry but $40 for miniature Sylvanian Meerkat figurine things just seems cra cra CRAZY to me - and i get in trouble with the T when i tell him just how mental spending that kind of money on a toy - that is not even a toy - is. I mean what does a 10 year old kid actually DO with miniature plastic Meerkats?

Anywayyyyy....

Before we even left the house this morning - we argued about NOT arguing - while we were out shopping. The fact that we had to discuss not arguing - which then turned into an argument - ended up making us laugh pretty hard.

We ended up having a lovely shopping trip and hunted out some pretty mean bargains. I saved the T lots of money with my bargain hunting this morning - so i plan to bite my tongue this afternoon while he purchases an overpriced Barbie - to add to the pile of Barbies that already fill his lounge, and overflow into his kitchen, and down his hallway...

72 hours to go until it is over for another year.

Don't Be Afraid of Failure - 2

'A righteous man may fall seven times and rise again...' Proverbs 24:16 NKJV

Star baseball players only hit the ball about three out of every ten times. How do they live with such a high failure rate? By focusing on the law of averages. They know that if they just keep swinging the bat, they'll get on base. In 1952 Roger Bannister ran in the Olympics and finished in fourth place, failing to win any kind of medal. But he refused to quit. Up until this time many experts considered it humanly impossible to run the mile in under four minutes. Yet that was Bannister's goal. And on 6 May 1954, he became the first man to do it. Now runners do it regularly.

What's the point? If you refuse to quit when you fail, you'll ultimately succeed. You just have to be willing to get back up and keep moving forward. In 1832 Abraham Lincoln was defeated for the State Legislature. In 1833 he failed in business. In 1835 his sweetheart died. In 1836 he had a nervous breakdown. In 1838 he was defeated for Illinois House Speaker. In 1843 he was defeated for nomination to Congress. In 1854 he was defeated for the US Senate. In 1856 he was defeated for nomination for Vice President. In 1858 he was defeated again in a US Senate race. But today he is considered one of America's greatest presidents.

A wise man concluded: 'It's a mistake to suppose that people succeed only through success; they often succeed through failures.' And you're not defeated until the past takes your focus off the future. So don't be afraid of failure.

I'm a bit sad this afternoon. I have just dropped my baby off at her Grandma's place and will not see her again until next year! She does not return from spending Christmas in Queenstown with her Dad until the 6th of January.

I can't recall the last time that i went two weeks without seeing her. Actually - i can - but i won't go there today.

I am going to miss her tons.

I still have the other two here. Billy is flying down there on the 27th, and Nicole is staying with me right through. I could kid myself and say that is because she can't stand the thought of being away from me but we all know that 16 year old girls struggle to spend five minutes away from their friends.

I cannot believe she passed up a free trip to Queenstown - to stay in Howick with kids that she sees every day - all year. I am trying to think back and remember if i would  have made the same choice at that age, and have come to the conclusion that i cannot answer that question for two reasons;

My parents never flew anywhere on holidays.
I had no friends anyway. ;)

What is up with this?

Child Porn Viewer Made Cry For Help

A judge has ensured a man will have a chance to get treatment after his "cry for help" when he viewed child pornography.

It was the second time that Christopher John Thomson, 41, had been convicted of possessing objectionable material.

He served a jail term in 2007, but Christchurch District Court Judge David Saunders said he did not believe Thomson received appropriate intervention at the time.

The prison term was too short for him to do a programme while in custody, and the release conditions were not long enough for him to go through a Stop programme for sex offenders.

Then, in February this year, he viewed child pornography again and became so distressed that he tried to harm himself.

He then called an ambulance and told the officers what had happened.

Police checked his computer and found 363 objectionable images of young girls posing naked or in provocative poses, or girls in sex acts with adults and other children.

Judge Saunders said the attempt Thomson made on his own life had been "very much a cry for help".

Thomson was refused name suppression when he pleaded guilty to 11 charges at a court session in September, and the judge refused it again yesterday.

He imposed five months of community detention and two years of supervision, which will include judicial monitoring. The judge will get a three-monthly report on Thomson's progress.

He also imposed a condition for Thomson to attend the Stop programme as directed, and to have no access to the internet unless for a specific, approved purpose. Thomson will not be allowed contact with anyone aged 16 or under unless they are with an approved adult.

If the Stop programme is not available, he will have to see a Corrections Department psychologist for counselling.

So Christoper Thomson has already been convicted of downloading and viewing child porn, and spent time in prison for that offence. He commits that offence again after being released and is sentenced to five months community detention because the judge considered his offending to be a cry for help?

IS THAT JUDGE FOR REAL???

Personally i am more concerned about the cries for help from abused children, than i am of the pathetic suicide attempts of a man who is part of the reason that children the world over are being abused.

But hey - that's just me.

Let the pervert off scot free. No biggie. He just needs to attend a 'Stop being a disgusting pervert' program and realise that he is part of the reason that child porn exists in the first place.

It is really nice that Judge David Saunders wants to do good and change the world but ummm - bang those f*ckers up and THEN get them help and try to change the world AFTER their release.

Thanks.

P.S.

On that note - i will point out that Jamie Ginns' rape victim has received no counselling or assistance receiving counselling over her ordeal.

Offender gets help.

Victim gets fobbed off and directed to WINZ.

New Zealand is some kind of screwed up.

Don't Be Afraid of Failure - 1

'A righteous man may fall seven times and rise again...' Proverbs 24:16 NKJV

Until you overcome the fear of failure, you'll be immobilised at the prospect of taking a risk. The important thing to remember when you fail is not to quit. History shows that failure can actually become a bridge to success. In school, Napoleon was forty-second in a class of forty-three, yet he went on to build an army that conquered much of the world. George Washington lost two-thirds of his military battles, yet against overwhelming odds he won the Revolutionary War and changed American history. Albert Einstein was such a slow learner that it was suggested he switch studies from physics to some other topic, yet he's considered the father of the atomic age. When you recall these names you don't remember their failures but their contributions to the world.

Only when you consider your failure to be final, are you finally a failure. Failure is not an event, only an opinion, and as long as it's not your opinion you can come back and succeed. 'A righteous man may fall seven times and rise again.' In his first inaugural address Franklin Roosevelt told the nation, 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.' Failure is not fatal; you can begin again. But the fear of failure could prove fatal to your goals by keeping you from trying again. After cataloguing every possible scenario that could come against us, such as tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, peril, sword, Paul writes: 'Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us' (Romans 8:37 NKJV).

So the word for you today is - don't be afraid of failure.

I love it.

I was good yesterday. On Friday i received more forms and stuff in the mail for my Uni enrollment and instead of shoving them in a pile on a chair with the rest of my papers that i can't be bothered looking at - i filled them in straight away, got photocopies of the things they had requested, got them signed off and validated by someone - or whatever - and popped them straight back in the post.

I was pretty happy with myself. It's a small thing, i know - but i am notorious for my ability to procrastinate so - baby steps.

Right - i would love to stay and write for ages - but i can't. The Salvation Army is calling my name this morning.

Yip. Skip.

The Gluc Trophy

I had to laugh when i saw this in the Herald on Sunday this morning.


The Gluc Trophy

The actual Rachel Glucina

One of these things is not like the other.

Old Rachel Glucina is a bit cheeky thinking she could get away with that!

Probe No Further - Methamphetamine

Police probe high-flyer's death

Police are investigating the death of a former business high-flyer who died from an infection after a woman allegedly assaulted him with a mallet.

Lance John Bain died in hospital on December 3 after being rushed there by ambulance five days earlier.

The alleged assault happened in the West Auckland suburb of Ranui on November 17, but Mr Bain didn't immediately seek medical help.

Police are investigating on behalf of the Coroner, who requested they review the assault and "culmination of events" that led to Mr Bain's death.

The 43-year-old made his fortune selling cars and in property but lost millions of dollars in recent years after a difficult break-up from his wife Michele.

He was a fan of red Ferraris and had lived in some of Auckland's most exclusive suburbs, but lost all his property in mortgagee sales.

A close friend, Michael Ball, told the Weekend Herald he was planning a comeback and was hoping to start a new business venture when he died.

"He'd been at his lowest and he was making a comeback and wanted to start another business."

He said car dealers all called him "Mr South Auckland" because he was such an identity in the industry.

"He loved the colour red - had two red Ferraris and he painted his kitchen red and would pay more for a car if it was red."

But Mr Ball said his friend lost $8 million after his break-up which co-incided with the recession.

In 2005, the family featured in a Herald property story which said the family were moving out of their $2 million Orakei home because it was too big for them.

That house had a gym, internal courtyard with fireplace, air conditioning in three of the four bedrooms and a projection TV as well as views of Hobson Bay, the city and the harbour.

"It was like a domino effect how he lost everything. It just got worse and worse and worse."

The car industry "crashed" a couple of years back, at a time when Mr Bain was financing some car dealers in South Auckland, he said.

"The mortgages on a lot of properties were compounding because they weren't getting paid and they ended up selling for millions less than what they were worth."

Those properties included two waterfront sites in Pauanui that were sold "dirt cheap".

He was also deeply affected by not having contact with his two daughters.

Police would only say they were investigating on behalf of the Coroner.

But Mr Ball said he was told that his friend had been drinking at the address and went to sleep on the couch when he was attacked with a mallet.

He believed the woman read his cellphone while he was sleeping and saw that he had been sending text messages to another woman.

Later he showed him the bruising and said he would seek help for it but then they lost contact. The next he knew was that Mr Bain was in hospital suffering from blood poisoning.

He visited him four days before he died.

"He was talking a bit slower than usual but I thought he was on the mend, I really did."

Mr Ball only found out he had died through police.

Asleep on a couch at a house in Ranui = methamphetamine. I didn't know one druggie, and i don't know one former druggie that did not make daily trips to Ranui. Methamphetamine is about the only thing in Ranui.

"Domino effect how he lost everything - it just got worse and worse and worse." = methamphetamine addiction.

"At his lowest" = methamphetamine addiction.

No contact with his children / losing the people that you love the most = methamphetamine addiction.

Being in the company of a woman who is crazy enough to attack you with a mallet = methamphetamine addiction and the hideous people that come with it.

Not seeking medical treatment after being attacked by above mentioned crazy woman and her hammer = not wanting to explain to the police why or how you got yourself into that situation because then they will know that you are a P addict / methamphetamine addiction.

Lance Bain went from being a successful business man with a family - to having nothing and being attacked with a hammer by some crazy woman in a slum.

Now he is dead.

That is what meth does to every life it touches.

RIP Lance Bain.

Getting Older

'...outwardly...wasting away...inwardly...being renewed...' 2 Corinthians 4:16 NIV

You know you're getting older when: your knees buckle and your belt doesn't; you argue about which denture adhesive is best; you sit in a rocking chair and can't make it go; by the time you've lit the last candle on your birthday cake the first one has burned out; you no longer think 'getting older' jokes are funny.

Getting older isn't for the faint-of-heart, so the Bible gives us glimpses of what it entails. Isaac's eyesight gave out (Genesis 27:1). David was always cold (1 Kings 1:1-4). Paul referred to himself as 'Paul, the aged' (Philemon 1:9 NAS) and talked about the physical and emotional pains of old age - of feeling abandoned and lonely, being disappointed by fellow workers, and saying goodbye to friends he might never see again (2 Timothy 4:9-21).

Jon Walker writes: 'On my most recent birthday my sister sent me this message: 'The bad news: outwardly we are wasting away.' (Did I mention this is my older sister and, as I like to remind her, she'll always be my older sister!) Then she added, 'The good news: We do not lose heart...even though outwardly we are wasting away...the inward man is being renewed every day.' If you have creaky joints, arthritic hands, weakened eyes, a slow step, an ear that struggles to hear, or a heart that beats to the sound of a cholesterol drummer, be encouraged! God is preparing a...celebration for the day you arrive in Heaven, where you'll no longer age because you'll be home in the land of the ageless.'

Goodness - that is a bit depressing for a Sunday morning isn't it?

I was woken up at 6am this morning - for the SECOND day in a row. SOMEONE in my home doesn't realise that i like to sleep in. Or maybe they realise that i like to sleep in, and just don't care. Either way - i have not been able to enjoy my normal weekend sleep ins this weekend.

Grump over.

I had a wonderful evening with the kids the other night. All 4 of us went out shopping and bought a Christmas tree and all the decorations that go with it. It is nothing flash. I don't have a lot of money this Christmas so did not want to waste what little i did have on decorations. We had an awesome shopping trip though, and tons of fun. It is not often that all four of us are around at the same time and do something together as a family. One of them is always with a friend, at work etc etc...

For the first time since 2007 - i have a Christmas tree and my house feels like Christmas. It is awesome and i have actually gotten into the Christmas mood. I did not have  a Christmas tree in 2008 when i was involved in that hideous world. It did not matter that my Christmas tree and all my years of decoration collecting and the kids things that they had made when they were little were  probably lying in a rubbish tip somewhere - Christmas was just not happening for me that year. My children were in Dunedin with their dad so i "worked" and smoked drugs all day. My Christmas dinner was a Wild Bean pie from the BP in Khyber Pass. 2009 - my little flat in Mt Albert was just too small, and i had no money. 2010 - i don't know why i did not bother with Christmas but i think i used the excuse that i had gone without a Christmas tree for 3 years and the kids did not seem to mind so another year was not going to hurt. Christmas was a bit of a depressing time for me last year anyway.

Not. This. Year! I am going to have a full house on Christmas Eve and Day and we are doing Christmas properly this year. Christmas is exciting for me again. I can't wait!

Blogging has been light lately because i have been so busy with family stuff - and community service.  I am loving it.

Back to normal - eventually - i guess!

Moving On to Maturity

'Let us go on...and become mature...' Hebrews 6:1 TLB

Spiritually, some of us haven't grown up. 'You...ought to be teaching others, but instead you...need someone to teach you...until you become...mature...' (Hebrews 5:12-6:1 TLB).

Just as there are signs of physical growth, there are hallmarks of spiritual maturity like the ones mentioned in 1 Peter 3:8 AMP: (1) 'Be...united in spirit.' Now unity isn't the same as uniformity where everybody has to think alike, or even unanimity where we have to agree about everything. Unity is focusing on what unites us, instead of the petty issues that divide us. (2) 'Sympathising with one another.' The Greek interpretation of the word sympathy is 'to feel for' others. 'When [they're] happy, be happy with them...when they are sad, be sad' (Romans 12:15 CEV). When you become more concerned about others than you are about yourself, you're starting to mature. (3) 'Loving each other.' We all need friends to love and support us. The president of Taylor University said one of his greatest hopes is to end up with eight friends who'll attend his funeral without once checking their watches! (4) 'Be...compassionate.' In a high-tech age it's easy to tune out those in need. When Jesus saw people, '...He felt compassion...because they were distressed and dispirited...' (Matthew 9:36 NAS). Hurting people touched His heart, and they should touch ours too. (5) 'Be...humble.' Charles Swindoll says, 'Look for opportunities to give...to build up rather than tearing down, to serve rather than being served, to learn from others rather than clamouring for the teaching stand.'

So, how are you doing so far?

Dear Wonderful Children,

The waste master does not work. It has not worked for about a year - since one of you jammed something in it. It is not going to get fixed any time soon. Continuing to dump your food down the sink is not going to fix it. Continuing to dump your food down the sink only succeeds in ensuring that the water does not drain from it and i eventually have to stick my hand down there and dig out your soggy food.

I realise that our annoying visitor who goes by the name "NotME" is usually to blame for the food that ends up down the sink, but i just wanted to make sure that we are clear on this issue so - for the one milleeeeionth time - Stop. Putting. Your. Food. Down. The. Sink.

Kind regards,

Your patient and very tolerant Mother.

PS - I love you.

How to Turn Your Life Around

'Let me...glean...after him in whose sight I may find favour....' Ruth 2:2 NKJV

Ruth turned her life around when she was bereaved, broke and barren. How?

First: By choosing the right mentor. She told Naomi, '...wherever you go, I will go...' (Ruth 1:16 NKJV). The fact that Naomi was a Jew and Ruth a Gentile, or that Ruth was young and Naomi was older, didn't put Ruth off one bit. Doubtless, there were times they didn't see eye-to-eye or relate to each other at all. But when God wants to stretch you He will put somebody into your life with different experiences and insights. Naomi was Ruth's eyes and ears in a world she didn't know; she was her tutor and guide in getting Ruth to her destiny. God is raising up leaders with solutions for today's problems. If you hope to be called for duty, recognise those He sends to prepare you. Whether they come to cheer, comfort, counsel or correct you, remember the words of Jesus, '...he who receives Me receives Him who sent Me' (John 13:20 NKJV).

Secondly: By getting into the right field. Ruth said, 'Let me...glean...after him in whose sight I may find favour.' Things were bad in Moab but good in Bethlehem. So Ruth left the comfort of the familiar, stepped out in faith, and not only ended up surviving, but thriving. In the end she married Boaz, the owner of the field, and went on to become part of the family of King David and our Lord Jesus Christ. How's that for a turnaround?

God's plan for your future involves connecting with the right people, and being in the right field. So ask Him to guide you.

Nicole wants an iphone for Christmas and there is a runny kitten poop under my dining room table.

That is all.

Andy Rooney on Women Over Forty

This made me laugh when i read it today - so i thought i would share it with you lot.

Andy Rooney says:

As I grow in age, I value women who are over forty most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over forty will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, “What are you thinking?” She doesn’t care what you think.

If a woman over forty doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it’s usually something more interesting.

A woman over forty knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of forty give a hoot what you might think about her or what she’s doing.

Women over forty are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it’s like to be unappreciated.

A woman over forty has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn’t trust the guy with other women. Women over forty couldn’t care less if you’re attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won’t betray her.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over forty. They always know.

A woman over forty looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over forty is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one! You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over forty for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it’s not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of forty-plus, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some twenty-two-year-old waitress.
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Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free,” here’s an update for you. Now 80 percent of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage.

Garden Update



Peas

Beans

Corn

Learn to Delegate

'This job is too heavy...to handle all by yourself.' Exodus 18:18 NLT

President Reagan said, 'Surround yourself with the best people you can find, delegate authority, and don't interfere.' Yet in our eagerness to please God we take on responsibilities that are 'too heavy...to handle all by [ourselves].' Moses was spending every waking minute listening to complaints from long lines of people. Finally his father-in-law said, 'You're going to wear yourself out - and the people, too,' and advised him to appoint capable leaders to 'help...carry the load' (Exodus 18:22 NLT). It was a win-win solution; the people got help faster, and Moses became a better leader.

Henry and Richard Blackaby write: 'One of our greatest challenges...is determining what God doesn't want us to do! We love God, we love His people, and we see many needs. But sometimes good intentions cause more harm than good...When you become aware of a need, don't automatically assume God wants you to meet it. The only reason to perform ministry is when God clearly tells you it's His will. If you're overwhelmed...you're probably doing more than God asked. Pray about the assignments you take on, so you don't rob yourself and others of God's best.' Jon Walker adds: 'Imagine if God created you to be the Michelangelo of this age but you stayed so busy doing all kinds of things - good things - that you never got around to painting and sculpting. You'd end up missing the best because you got distracted chasing the good. What a disappointment...for God...and all the people who would have been blessed if you'd stayed focused on your original purpose.'

Learn to delegate. Release the burdens God never meant you to carry, and focus on what He called you to do.

I am so tired this morning. I have been having the worst sleeps every night this past week. It has reminded me of back in the day when i was still recovering from that awful drug and i used to wake up every two hours - then take another two hours to get back to sleep.

I have been having awful nightmares. Last night's one consisted of me trying to get away from something (i can't remember what) and an awful man with a giant sized fish hook kept catching me with that awful hook and dragging me back.

It took me forever to get back to sleep at 3am after waking up to the thought of a fish hook digging in to my skin.

I think that dream is my punishment for making fun of he who shall not be named and likening him to Jigsaw! That was a bit naughty.

Off to community service this morning - half asleep - then an evening of Celebrity Apprentice and the promos for Embarrassing Bodies, with the T to look forward to tonight.

Billy is off to The Foo Fighters tonight. Lucky Kid! I'm very jealous.

Life is mostly cool. I just need to be able to sleep properly again.

Three Rules for Living

'For the Lord gives wisdom...' Proverbs 2:6 NKJV

To succeed in life you must do these three things:

(1) Decide what's important. The story's told of a family who moved to the country to get away from the city. They decided to raise cattle so they bought a ranch. One day a friend visited them and asked what they'd named it. Dad said, 'I wanted to call it The Flying-W, but Mum wanted to call it The Suzy-Q. One of our sons liked The Bar-J, but our daughter preferred The Lazy-Y. So we compromised and called it The Flying-W, Suzy-Q, Bar-J, Lazy-Y Ranch.' The friend asked, 'How are your cattle doing?' Dad replied, 'We don't have any. They didn't survive the branding.' Come on, decide what's important to you!

(2) Prioritise your time. Too many of us are like the store owner who got so busy trying to keep the place clean that he forgot to open the front door. The reason you're in business is to serve customers and make a profit, not get distracted by secondary things. Base your life's decisions on your priorities. And if you need help figuring out what they are, ask God: 'For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.'

(3) Learn to motivate yourself. Most times, nobody else will. When tragedy struck his life, we read: 'David encouraged himself in the Lord...' (1 Samuel 30:6 KJV). You need to learn how to do that too. Jude writes: '...building up yourselves...praying in the Holy Ghost' (Jude 1:20 KJV). To succeed in life you must learn to encourage yourself, pray and build yourself up.

Rainy. Gross. Yucky. Day.

I have just under 100 k to go if i am going to run my 700 kilometres this year. The weather is apparently, supposed to be like this for the next 7 days - so i might not make it. I love my runs - but not enough to do it in the rain.

I suppose i should have gotten all my dry laundry in off the line last night as well.

O well.

We made the most of it not raining yesterday. I nearly killed myself on a flying fox at some park out at Waikowhai Bay. Seriously - forget bungee jumping, and paying a small fortune to risk killing yourself doing crazy things - just have a go on that flying fox. I crashed into the end of it, ended up upside down in the air, and my sunglasses landed about a mile away from where i landed.

It was fun though. Great cheap entertainment for the kids. They all thought it was hysterical when i nearly killed myself!

T was a wuss and made his ride go slow - somehow. What a girl.

Scarier than it looks!

Peter Dunne Buried Report on Attitudes Towards Alcohol in New Zealand

Associate Health Minister Peter Dunne's actions in supressing research regarding the public's attitude to alcohol during the consideration of the Alcohol Reform Bill is deeply concerning, Green Party health spokesperson Kevin Hague said today.

The Ministry of Health requested the Health Sponsorship Council launch a major survey on New Zealanders attitudes to alcohol. This survey could have assisted MPs during the Select Committee consideration of the Alcohol Reform Bill. However the Health Sponsorship Council report and its findings were never made public.

"Minister Dunne's explanations for burying the report - that publishing the report would cost too much and the results didn't add value - are simply not credible," said Mr Hague.

"The actions regarding the suppression of the Health Sponsorship Council's report need to be investigated fully.

"Minister Dunne should front up and answer questions regarding why he considered this report should have been hidden from MPs and the public.

"Suppressing a report because it contains inconvenient evidence is anti-democratic," said Mr Hague.

"The Key Government has a once in a generation opportunity to take effective action to reduce alcohol-related harm with lawyers, doctors, researchers and public opinion all supporting price increases, restrictions on availability, and reduced advertising and sponsorship.

"They seem determined not only not to take this opportunity, but actually to destroy it."

I want to know why Peter Dunne suppressed this report.

I want to know why John Key allowed this report to be buried.

I want to know what is in that report.

Yep. I sure do.

Chrisco = RIP OFF

Paul Little on the Occupy Protesters and Chrisco

CHRISCO

As annoying as the misguided doings of the Occupiers are, at least we live in a country where they have the freedom to do it - and the legal backing to continue doing it. Unfortunately, this also means that operators like Chrisco has the freedom to do what it does.

Chrisco has been proudly profiting from the underclass - or "making it easy to enjoy a magical Christmas" - since 1977. For those who don't read their junk mail, the company works by encouraging members of the underclass to contribute a weekly amount which, at the end of the year, entitles them to a Christmas stocking containing a selection of gaudy crud. They'd be better putting $5 a week under the mattress.

But you can't accuse Chrisco of lacking entertainment value. Just last month, it was in the news over a controversial offering. As a deadpan report in the Herald on Sunday described it: "Customers can choose between muskets, pistols, revolvers and a giant 1.5L rifle, made from glass and filled with rum, tequila or vodka. The products cost between $75 and $300 and will arrive in time for Christmas Day."

Nothing says Christmas quite like a replica firearm full of piss.

Now the company has been done for stinging its victims with unlawful cancellation fees when the latter find out they need to spend their money on food rather than a Glock full of cognac.

A Chrisco mouthpiece said the company had been "working with" - corporate speak for "trying to wriggle out from under" - the Commerce Commission for three years on the issue. That's your money being tied up while Chrisco tries to justify its practices.

With its target market of gullible and impoverished people, Chrisco has been compared to the instant-finance loan sharks who also afflict the underclass. But loan sharks let people decide what they will spend their money on. Chrisco locks them into "hamper" deals with a small selection of banal options.

On their website, the company calls what it does "magic". I agree. Getting poor people to pay more than they need to for something not worth having in the first place is a pretty neat trick.

MISSING MICHAEL LAWS YET?

Me neither.

I absolutely adore Paul Little's column. He rarely writes anything that i disagree with.

Who would put that crap on their table on Christmas Day?

Andi Brotherston Quits TVNZ

Spin doc Andi quits 'thankless' TVNZ job

TVNZ spokeswoman Andi Brotherston has quit. Brotherston - who embroiled in the fallout defending former Breakfast host Paul Henry - said she was sick of the huge amount of flak.

The biggest backlash came in July 2010 after Henry asked Prime Minister John Key whether he'd choose a new Governor-General "who looks and sounds like a New Zealander this time".

Brotherston issued a statement on behalf of TVNZ which said: "The audience tell us over and over again that one of the things they love about Paul Henry is that he's prepared to say the things we quietly think but are scared to say out loud."

She apologised but her offer to resign soon after was rejected.

"I've had an amazing three years and learned heaps," she said this week. "It's just a great job, but ultimately it's just a thankless job. It's been fun and interesting but I just want to go and do something that feels like I'm contributing more ... I don't feel that I'm contributing to the community in any way by doing what I'm doing."

Brotherston, who is married to sports broadcaster Martin Devlin, said she was leaving on her own terms.The broadcaster said it would not comment on an individual's employment matters.

Cool.

Now the nasty woman can spend all of her days running around protecting her whiny voiced, weirdo, anger management requiring, hyperactive husband's reputation - and defending right wing racists without having to apologise.

Thanks Andi!

Change Can Happen For You - 3

'And He...said, "Behold, I make all things new..."' Revelation 21:5 KJV

Observe: (1) Change means accepting risk. Your anxiety will kick in and say, 'What if I don't get the job? What if the economy fails? What if I make the effort to change but they don't?' We like ironclad guarantees. The predictable feels less threatening than sticking our necks out. But the price of our security often means remaining stuck with the status quo. Sometimes your greatest risk is taking no risk at all! God often requires you to leave the path that feels and looks safe for the one that feels and looks risky. 'Now faith is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things [we] hope for...the proof of things [we] do not see...' (Hebrews 11:1 AMP). Your faith is foolproof assurance, God's confirmation, the title deed guaranteeing that the change you want will take place if you act on it.

(2) Change will happen if failure is not allowed to stop you. Fear of failing often stops us from trying, yet many of God's best people experienced failure on their way to success. Consider Abraham, Moses, Elijah, David etc. All of them succeeded only after dealing with personal failure. Indeed, the richest, most profound change often happens after we've tasted failure. Until then we tend to be cocky and of not much use to God. Peter failed the Lord miserably, and at the most crucial moment (Matthew 26:72). But he grew, becoming Christ's choice to lead His newly empowered church on the Day of Pentecost, winning three thousand souls (Acts 2). Don't let failure stop you!

I love it.

Feeling better today. I am going to get my butt moving, pack this dog up, and head over to T's place. We are going to take the kids and Nixon out to a park and for a big walk - weather permitting. It's still pretty warm out there though - despite the clouds.

Spent my first Saturday night in ages alone last night. T had decided to stay at his place with his tribe. I would usually hang out there with them, but i just didn't feel like leaving Billy and Nicole on their own last night, so i just chilled at home with the laptop, the kids, and the dog. It was actually nice - but now i am missing the T so i am going to hurry up and get moving.

Enjoy your Sundays you lot!

Later!

Change Can Happen For You - 2

'And He...said, "Behold, I make all things new..."' Revelation 21:5 KJV

Here are two more life-changing principles:

(1) You must be willing to change unconditionally. In the early stage of therapy counsellors bump into the 'change-if' syndrome. The client sees change as a strategy of give-to-get: 'I'll change if they are willing to do... If not, I won't.' With God, your reward for changing is intrinsic. You get the joy of His approval, plus all the benefits that follow from being a changed person. This includes God's gift of '...salve to put on your eyes, so you can see' (Revelation 3:18 NIV). The ability to see things clearly will enable you to understand the problem and deal with it effectively, regardless of what someone else does or doesn't do.

(2) You must accept the truth that change means letting go of the past. Whatever you cling to ultimately controls you. If the offence resulted from your actions, or the loss from your poor judgment, confess it to God, receive forgiveness and leave it at the cross. If it was the other person's fault but you've held onto it because you think you're the innocent party and 'deserve your pound of flesh', the freedom you forfeit and the options you miss are too high a price for the false comfort of being right. 'Forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you' (Ephesians 4:32 NIV) will release you from the chains of resentment, giving you back your future. If you're bound by chains of regret over 'coulda, woulda, shoulda', God stands ready to make your future better than your past could ever have been (Joel 2:25).

I have hit a wall today. I really have. I am feeling really empty, sad and like everything that has happened this past week has caught up to me all at once.

Billy is at work, Nicole is somewhere - in her room sleeping off her late night i think - and the T and his tribe have gone back to their place for the day. My house is too quiet. I need to get off my butt and go for a run with Nixon or something, but i can't be bothered so i just keep sitting here staring at my screen and thinking too much.

The funeral yesterday was hard. Really hard. I was standing next to the girlfriend of one of Billy's other cousins while the coffin was being loaded into the hearse, and i asked her how this cousin was coping. She shook her head and said that he is just so angry at Ricci - just full of anger. I mentioned this conversation to Billy last night and Billy told me that he is really angry, as well.

How difficult it is for these kids - or anyone of any age really - to deal with such a mixture of emotions. Part of them loves and misses Ricci so much, but part of them is just so angry at him for doing that to himself, and putting everyone that loves him through this. You have to believe that if Ricci could see the pain that his suicide would cause everyone that loves him - he never would have done it.

I don't think anyone would want to put their loved ones through that, no matter how unhappy or hopeless things seemed.

There was no drama at the funeral. I was so relieved at how both families put aside their differences for Ricci yesterday. I was especially proud of all of Billy's family - proud to know them - proud that my son is part of their family. They held their heads high and came together for each other - and Ricci - like a loving and close family should. It again made me feel grateful that Billy has always had such a big family to be a part of. That was one good thing that i took away from the day.

Now that i am sitting here alone - i feel like a whole week's worth of emotions have hit me at once. I think i might have a sleep, then head over to T's and get myself distracted by a noisy and rambunctious household.

Family - that is what i need right now.

Why are the Police being congratulated?

Ex-wife key witness in cold case

The main witness against a pensioner charged with a 32-year-old cold case murder is his former wife, the Weekend Herald has learned.

The evidence, inadmissible until a law change five years ago, has proved crucial for police investigating the mystery of service station attendant Rodney Tahu's death in 1979.

A 70-year-old man appeared in the Rotorua District Court this week charged with the murder of Mr Tahu, a married father of two sons, who was shot dead outside the Shell service station in Turangi.

He was granted bail and interim name suppression that will lapse on December 19.

Police would not reveal the breakthrough that led to the arrest but hinted at changes in allegiances and relationships.

The Weekend Herald has spoken to several sources with knowledge of the case who believe the accused, a former Taupo real estate agent, told his wife at the time what happened.

Taupo Mayor Rick Cooper said he was pleased an arrest had been made after so long and congratulated the police.

Seems to me that the only reason there has been an arrest in this case, is because a woman who was happy to cover up a murder for her husband for over 30 years has now decided to grow a conscience.

Hardly CSI, or pat each other on the back stuff.

How credible is a woman that was happy to live with, and lie for a murderer - only to change her mind when she became a member of the first wive's club?

Not much.

Change Can Happen For You - 1

'And He...said, "Behold, I make all things new..."' Revelation 21:5 KJV

The Bible's story is one of change from Genesis, the book of 'beginnings', to Revelation, where God says: 'Behold, I make all things new.' Whatever your situation today, change is possible through Him. However often you've repented, confessed and tried changing, God can change what you can't-and make it last. But change requires understanding certain principles.

Let's look at them: (1) You don't need to change others in order to change your life. 'I'd be happier if he'd stop...' 'Things won't improve for me till she...' Such beliefs make you focus on the problem and not the solution, ignore realistic options and feed depression. 'Each person should judge his own actions and not compare himself with others' (Galatians 6:4 NCV). Instead of trying to change others, which only produces resistance and resentment, let God show you what you need to do differently to improve your handling of the problem. When you stop doing what doesn't work and change your reactions to the problem, others often change spontaneously.

(2) True change begins by addressing your relationship with God. Bitterness and frustration over problems just result in distancing from God, leaving you to handle the issue in your own strength. Surrendering to Him changes you fundamentally, challenging pride, envy, resentment, fear, dishonesty etc - characteristics of poor change management. 'Let us search out and examine our ways, and turn back to the Lord' (Lamentations 3:40 NKJV). With 'our lives under God', we're more honest, self-aware, able to perceive realistically; we're respectful, and prepared to become God's change agents.

I used to say that the worst noise in the world was a baby's cry. I have changed my mind. The sound of a mother crying as a coffin closes on her child's body is worse.

Today has been truly awful. I pray that no one in my family - or any other family for that matter - ever has to go through anything like this again. 

That is about all i have to say right now.

The aftermath is unbelievable

I don't think i will be going to Ricci's funeral tomorrow. I think Billy is going to go, but i am not sure that i want to be there. I am in so many different minds about it.

I was horrified on Monday when i walked down the hospital corridor right into the middle of two families about to come to blows, just metres away from Ricci's bed. I felt an unbelievable desire to protect my son from the accusations that were flying back and forth, and the 15 year old grudges that were being brought up. It was upsetting that my son was having to listen to that, when all he wanted to do was be there for his cousin. Instead - he was stuck in a corridor listening to the people who are supposed to be the adults in those families - fight.

At the time, all i could think was that this was not the time or place to be pointing fingers, and blaming - that Ricci should have been their only focus. I tried to understand and empathise with the anger that filled the room. I put it down to emotions being so high. I didn't understand it though. I didn't understand how they could take their focus away from Ricci to yell at each other.

Nothing has gotten better during the week. Ricci's father's family, who is also Billy's family have been excluded from everything. Billy and i were the only ones from the family that were there yesterday.

Ricci's mum is a great lady and i consider her a friend. I understand some of her grievances, and some of why she feels the way that she does. No family is perfect though. No person is perfect.  Ricci and Billy's fathers' family are great people, and i consider them to be my family too.

There is enough guilt to go around at the moment without the fighting, and the blaming. What is done is done. Now is the time for forgiveness, and i don't want to be there tomorrow unless that is what will be happening.

I don't want to be stuck on a fence tomorrow.

Then again - i don't want my son to be in the middle of any drama on his own either.

This is going to be a sleepless night. I don't know what the best thing to do is.

Just Enough

'...Each family had just what it needed.' Exodus 16:18 NLT

In the wilderness God provided His people with manna so that they wouldn't go hungry. It appeared miraculously each morning: 'Everyone had just enough. Those who gathered a lot had nothing left over, and those who gathered...a little had enough. Each family had just what it needed.'

Ever notice there are times in life when God's blessings seem to '...overtake you...' (Deuteronomy 28:2 NAS)? Your prayers are getting answered, the doctor's report is good, the bills are paid, your job is going great and your children are finally on the right track. When that happens, rejoice and thank God for His goodness. Then there are other times when He gives you 'just enough' light to take one more step. That's when He's teaching you to trust Him on a daily (or sometimes hourly) basis; to test His Word and see for yourself that '...His mercies...are new every morning...' (Lamentations 3:22-23 NCV).

Bottom line: God never lets us gather tomorrow's manna today. The Bible says He will '...supply all your need according to His riches in glory' (Philippians 4:19 KJV). He wants you to rely on the Giver and not the gift, to trust Him to meet all your needs, and to expect that He will bring good things out of bad situations. Instead of getting stressed out, He wants you to: '...let [all] your requests be made known to God' (Philippians 4:6 NKJV); to stop fretting when you're alone because He will '...never leave you nor forsake you' (Deuteronomy 31:6 NIV); to realise that no matter what life throws at you, you never have to question His love because it's '...everlasting...' (Jeremiah 31:3 KJV).

That is what i really need to read right now - with the stress of Christmas and between the two of us T and i have SIX kids to make a good Christmas for. It was bad enough worrying about having enough when it was just my three - add another three to that and i am not enjoying the prospect of Christmas at all. I just want it over and done with.

The Brady Bunch cannot afford Christmas this year. Make. It. Go. Away.

On a brighter note - there is hopefully and tiny dot of light at the end of the dark tunnel. I have finally enrolled in University study for next year. The T really gave me the push that i needed to decide what i want to do with the next 25 years of my life - and get busy doing it.

Next year will be better.

On that note, i am back at Community Service today, and it is the last thing that i feel like doing today. I don't want to move. I don't  feel like listening to the porn star's constant banter. I am not in the mood for putting up with the bossy lady that talks to me like i am a 5 year old. I have yet to do blogging revenge on that old bag - just you wait though - it's coming!

Not. My. Day.