Saturday Night

And i am lying in bed thinking about my kids - all three of them - but especially the one that is not here right now - and is mad at me.

I found this on the net, and it gave me a giggle, and made me feel a bit better. Seems i am not the only mum who has a teenager who doesn't seem to like her much. Funny - she is 16.

6 Years: Mom Knows Everything !
8 Years: Mom Knows AlOot !
12 Years: Mom Really Doesn't Know Everything !
14 Years: Mom Knows Nothing !
16 Years: Mom, What Mom !
18 Years: Mom Is Outdated !
25 Years: Maybe Mom Knows!
35 Years: Before Deciding, Let's Ask Mom!
45 Years: I Wonder What Mom Thinks!
75 Years: I Wish Mom Was Here To Ask....

I love you Coley. x

I wasn't going to watch it...

But i did.

What a lovely wedding that was. Didn't Kate Middleton look absolutely stunning? I was having a conversation with my sister, who had woken up to watch it at 3am - Boise, Idaho time - while i watched it.

In between our sore stomachs from laughing at all the ridiculous hats, we both pondered what it would be like to be Kate right now.  That lasted about 2 minutes before we both decided that we love having our own opinions too much. Yep - i love my opinions far more than i could ever possibly love being a beautiful princess.

Speaking of things that we were laughing at - what is up with Louise Wallace's face?!?! I had to do a double take to make sure it was even her. The surgeon that did that should be struck off. She was a sitting, tight faced, advertisement for growing old disgracefully. I could not believe it. She doesn't even look like herself anymore.

What a lovely distraction that wedding, and everything about it was.

Right - back to thinking the Royals are pain in the butt tax drains...and cancelling that head transplant with a cat that i was booked in to have.

Hats off - no pun intended - to the guard for being able to keep a straight face!

I think it is safe to say that the mice forgot to help Anastasia and Drusilla, with their outfits for the Royal Wedding.

New Zealanders have short memories

When it comes to politics - or maybe not. I saw a poll that showed that 75% of people would not vote for Don Brash.

My documentary last night was The Hollow Men. The whole thing can be viewed either on Youtube or at NZ Onscreen - The Hollow Men.

I tend to agree with Act Party President, Chris Simmon's original statement regarding Don Brash - He is a grumpy old man.

“[He is] an old man that has been passed over by the National Party previously, has not had his words heard on the 2025 taskforce by the Prime Minister. He’s angry, he’s grumpy and this is his attempt to try and destabilise us,” Mr Simmons says. - 3 News

Politics are a crazy business. It reminds me of the playground at primary school, where loyalties are decided and changed based on the most trivial of matters. Memories are short - our best friend the day before, can just as easily be someone that we ignore the next day, and vice versa. Backstabbing is rife, as is sucking up to the kid that has a swimming pool - but only during summer - of course.  If no one likes the swimming pool having kid in the winter - well we best not be liking him / her either. He / she will forget how mean we were to them during the winter months anyway - once summer rolls around.

I am starting to think that politicians are nothing more than mentally immature, over grown kids, that never really wanted to leave school.  Instead of growing up, and becoming part of the real world, they join the playground that is our Parliament, and just become our country's biggest and highest paid dole bludgers.

I will be paying even less attention to the Act Party, than i paid it before - if that is possible - now that Don Brash will be it's leader.

I don't think Don Brash is a good, or honest man, that cares about The Act Party, or New Zealanders. I doubt the National Party are too worried about their loss - in fact i bet they are pretty happy.

This Alister Barry-directed documentary is about the National Party and the 2005 election; it was made in conjunction with Nicky Hager’s book written from leaked party e-mails. Barry follows novice MP, and then leader, Don Brash through a hyper-charged era in NZ politics as National attempts to reconcile a political agenda with electability, and to unseat Helen Clark’s Labour government. Speechwriters, advertising agencies, pollsters and party donors all feature, as do Brash’s infamous Orewa speeches, Exclusive Brethren “attack” pamphlets and Iwi/Kiwi billboards.

Delete

Ever had one of those days that you wish just had a delete button and could be erased? Yeah well...i have just had one of those.

You know, i struggle to regret my past, because without it and everything i did, and have been through, i would not be the person that i am today. I kinda like who i am these days, and i was just saying to someone last night, that i have never been happier.

I think the only regret that i have, is that i wasn't always the person that i am now - you know - that it required such a rock bottom time in the first place for me to live a life of gratitude, love, and happiness, and to realise what, and who are really important.

I sometimes wonder if i will ever be able to do enough, to make up for my mistakes though. I sometimes wish that i could take the kids back to when they were babies and wouldn't go to anyone else but me. I sometimes wish i could go back to dropping them off at daycare, and hearing their cries as i left them behind, and then see their smiles when i returned.  I wish i could take them back to when they were 5 years old, and clinging to my legs, as i tried to leave them at school on their first day.

I always wish, that i had made the most of every single one of those moments, and had not been rushing off to work, or worrying about something else that really didn't matter. I wish i could do it all again, and be the person that i am now - instead of who i was then.

95% of the time i feel like i am doing the best that i can now, and that we have a good relationship. That is all that has mattered to me these past two years. My relationship with them, is the only thing that i have cared about.

5% of the time though, i feel like such a failure as a parent, so ashamed of the example that i set for them in the past, and so frustrated because i just don't know if anything will ever be enough to make it up to them.

Today - has been one of those days. I just want to delete today, then empty that flipping recycle bin - forever.

Walking on water - 1

'...He walked on the water... to Jesus.'Matthew 14:29 NKJV

The disciples were out fishing one night when a huge storm struck. At about 3am they were terrified by a figure approaching them on the water. '...Immediately Jesus spoke... "Be of good cheer! It is I; do not be afraid"...Peter answered... "Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You"...So He said, "Come." And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water... to Jesus' (Matthew 14:27-29 NKJV).

This story teaches us, first, that if the Lord doesn't call us to do it, don't! There's a story about a man standing at the gates of Heaven. Peter says, 'Name one great deed you've done.' The man replies, 'Well, a gang of bikers was threatening a woman so I smacked them, kicked over their bikes and ripped out their nose rings.' Impressed, Peter asks, 'When did this happen?' The man answers, 'About 30 seconds ago!' To walk on water you must learn to discern between God's voice and your own impulses.

Second, it teaches us that to experience miracles, we must get out of our comfort zone. Exchange places with Peter. The storm is raging and he's afraid. The boat's secure and comfortable. Wouldn't you want to stay there? But you can't. God designed you to do more than simply avoid failure; He's calling you to step out in faith and accomplish things. You say, 'What's my boat?' It's anything you put your faith in when life gets stormy, like a job or a relationship. Your boat is anything that stops you from getting out of your comfort zone. Leaving it is the scariest but most rewarding step you'll ever take!

"About 30 seconds ago" haha...that made me laugh.

Nothing new happening here in my little world. I am still recovering from this flu that i caught while away at the Mount.

I am going to try to motivate myself today though - Nicole and I are planning on house hunting. Considering there are not many 3 bedroom houses in this area that are under $500 bucks a week...i may need the depression.org website by the end of the day!

Wish us luck! Hopefully we will find something before one of us completely falls through the hole in the bathroom floor! haha

Awww my rotten bathroom floor is doing a sad face :(

Selu Bond Moala doesn't like cats

Well, i don't like ignorant, drunk, violent men, that pick their noses, but that doesn't mean i go around killing them.

Selu Bond Moala picking his nose...

A 19-year-old man killed a kitten by throwing an empty beer bottle at it because he "didn't like cats".

Selu Bond Moala was sentenced to 150 hours' community work when he appeared in the Manukau District Court yesterday after being convicted of wilfully ill-treating an animal.

His lawyer, Mary-Anne Lowe, said Moala did not know how injured the kitten was after hitting it with the bottle.

She said Moala had pleaded guilty early, was still at school and could be eligible for a discharge without conviction in other circumstances.

But Judge Charles Blackie said he would not consider a discharge without conviction.

"I think a discharge without conviction would cause public outrage," he said.

Judge Blackie said Moala had been drinking with a friend when he had thrown the beer bottle at the kitten.

Judge Blackie said Moala was asked by police why he had thrown the bottle. "You said you didn't like cats. I don't think people like you at this point in time."

The judge also read from a victim impact statement from a woman who had to explain the death of the kitten to her children. The kitten did not belong to the woman but came to her house and she would feed it.

"Her children were very sad that the kitten was killed. One child tried to wake the kitten up but it was clearly dead."

Judge Blackie said people like Moala were sent to prison.

"I can tell you there is very little sympathy for people like you who mistreat animals."

Ms Lowe said outside court the case was "very sad".

"The best thing he could do is acknowledge it, and he does."

She said she hoped Moala might be able to work with animals as part of his community service.

At his home in Otara, Moala said he didn't mean to hit the cat and he was sorry for what he had done.

His mother, Noleni Moala, said she had been to see the cat's owner to apologise on behalf of her son.

The executive director of the SPCA's Auckland branch, Bob Kerridge, said he thought some time in the "cooler" would have been appropriate.

Mr Kerridge said 150 hours' community work was a light sentence.

"Obviously it was a deliberate act and it certainly deserves more if we are to send the message that such acts are unacceptable."

Perhaps anti violence, alcohol abuse, and anger management courses to go along with this community service sentence would have been appropriate as well?

I'm not a judge - or a psychologist - but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realise that people who commit acts of cruelty against animals, usually graduate to violent offending against humans.

I don't see how a small number of hours doing community service is going to prevent this man from further offending.

Mayday Protest Auckland

"The only thing necessary for evil to triumph, is for good men to do nothing- Edmund Burke"

Time - 01 May · 12:00 - 15:00
Where - Aotea Square

The government’s subversion of the democratic process to pass a contentious amendment to the Copyright Act, in an effort to deny the renewed opportunity of public outcry, was both unnecessary and contrary to the purpose of emergency powers granted after the Christchurch Earthquake.

During the night of the reading, perhaps because of fatigu......e, the members of parliament failed to display comprehensive knowledge of the subject. One of them compared the internet to a fictitious computer model, which in that context was a malicious Artificial Intelligence bent on global conquest. Such scenarios are best left to the medium of fiction rather than serious debate in parliament. This demonstrated a woeful lack of understanding on behalf of the member who failed the public as an astute and knowledgeable representative.

This amendment harms the rights of New Zealanders. It has been described as a blatant intrusion on privacy and disproportionate to the harm done. The growing consensus that the internet is developing into a fundamental human right in our society, especially its importance to socio-economic activities indicates suspension is both unreasonable and an ultimately unworkable method of punishment. Notwithstanding its intrusive nature, there are serious issues surrounding whether New Zealanders will have access to justice.

The burden is on the alleged infringer to prove their innocence. The mere accusation is enough to warrant a first strike. The alleged infringer is denied the opportunity to legal representation during their hearing at the tribunal. The general purpose of tribunals is to obtain a judgement efficiently and to minimise costs. It is also reliant on the equality of the parties. However, there is a clear imbalance between them. The infringer is unlikely to have access to the legal team, the funds, or the experience in successfully defending these matters that will be available to their corporate opponent. These factors coupled with the fact the infringer must prove their innocence is contrary to the principles surrounding access to justice in New Zealand and encourages the abuse of the Tribunal’s processes.

It is unlikely that a quick glimpse into the deficiencies of this amendment would have gone unnoticed by the members of parliament. To suggest otherwise would raise doubts of the competency of its membership. The heart of the problem remains, as Sir Geoffrey Palmer once suggested, the ‘unbridled power’ of New Zealand’s “elected dictatorship”. That is the lack of accountability for the misuse of power by politicians acting under crown immunity. There are no checks and balances against this behaviour and in this case the result has been the use of urgency to pass contentious legislation, which is an affront to the democratic principles of access to justice.

Continued crown immunity can lead to successive failures on the part of Government to address the legitimate needs of New Zealanders. It is not possible to please everybody; however there have been issues where government has quite poignantly rejected the majority of public opinion. The debate over the anti-smacking bill was an example where it was quite clearly rejected by New Zealanders but the Government implemented the bill. Another example is the soon to be introduced intellectual property restrictions opposed on Pharmac that will affect access to healthcare for New Zealanders despite strong academic criticism. These successive failures could be fettered by increased accountability at the government level and more democratic involvement.

May 1st we protest against "Idiots in Power". We draw a line in the land and demand they remove Crown and Judicial Immunity. It is now time for Politicians and Judges to be accountable.

I might go to this. I have never been to a protest before. I am sure that is something that everyone should do at least once - you know - one of those bucket list things.

I am not though, particularly interested in the Copyright Act because it will mean that i might no longer be able to download my much loved documentaries that i watch every night, and i already buy most of my music. Maybe i am old - or just old school - but there is something about having the actual CD that i like.

The issue that i have with the Copyright Act is how it was passed, and the fact that anyone and everyone who is affected by this law change will be considered guilty, until proven innocent.

The use of "Urgency" by our current government is something that we should all be concerned about. It suggests a lack of regard for parliamentary process. In this government's first two years in power, it has used urgency for 331.5 hours, nearly double the time the former Labour Government sat under urgency in its full first term. In that time, it has pushed through 17 laws without allowing select committee examination. Labour's figure was four or five each term.

Why?

Legislation rushed though in this manner has a much reduced chance of being good law. When the select committee stage is bypassed, a valuable chance to iron out problems is removed and opposing viewpoints are denied due consideration. A glaring example of this was the law change introducing national standards in schools.

Various proposals have been put forward to reduce the use of urgency. Requiring a 75 per cent vote in Parliament before the select committee stage could be omitted for any bill is one of the more valid. Another suggestion is for more sitting weeks each year. But the total number of bills passed by National is little changed from that passed by Labour. That suggests National's problem is mostly one of attitude. For parties in a position of strength, urgency is a temptation that must be resisted ~ Addiction to Urgency a Sign of Weakness

Not only is it a sign of weakness - it is a sign of anti democracy. The amendment to the Copyright Act is not the reason that people should be protesting. The use of Urgency to pass it, and the fact that some - a lot - of the MPs that voted for it, do not even undertsand that Act themselves, are.

Melissa Lee announcing via Twitter that she was going to listen to a "compilation a friend did for me of K Pop", and Katrina Shanks' appalling speech are proof of this.

LEE: ALL MY K POP IS LEGAL

National MP Melissa Lee spoke out strongly against illegal file-sharing this week, but does she practise what she preaches?

As the Copyright (Infringing File Sharing) Amendment bill passed its third reading, Ms Lee told the House: "Breaking a law, whether it is actually assault on a person or an assault on a copyright, should be punished, not actually excused."

But earlier in the week, she said via Twitter that she was going to listen to a "compilation a friend did for me of K Pop" - South Korean pop music.

This was replied to by @christopherbull: "I really hope that compilation was all copyright cleared. Otherwise, you know, you'd be a glaring hypocrite."

Ms Lee said last night the compilation was made of songs that were legally downloaded and paid for.

"I'm not a pirate. I have never downloaded anything illegally in my life." Earlier she had told the House she did not even know how file-sharing through peer-to-peer systems worked.

National's List of Laws Passed Under Urgency

Laws which passed under urgency without any select committee consideration between December 2008 (when National came into Government) and December 2010:

Bail Amendment Bill provided for bail to be denied if there was any risk of a defendant absconding, interfering with witnesses, or offending while on bail.

 Education (National Standards) Amendment Bill implemented national standards in primary schools.

Employment Relations Amendment Bill introduced 90-day trial period for small companies and allowed bosses to consider KiwiSaver contributions when negotiating pay increases.

Sentencing (Offences Against Children) Amendment Bill required courts to take into account factors such as the defencelessness of victim, abuse of trust and attempts to hide the abuse when sentencing for child abuse or ill-treatment.

Taxation (Urgent Measures and Annual Rates) Bill introduced tax cuts, cut some aspects of Kiwisaver, including holding employer contribution levels at 2 per cent rather than increasing up to 4 per cent.

Energy (Fuels, Levies, And References) Biofuel Obligation Repeal Bill removed Labour's requirement for an increasing proportion of petrol and diesel sales to be biofuels.

Electricity (Renewable Preference) Repeal Bill removed Labour's 10-year ban on new fossil-fuelled thermal electricity generation.

Electoral Amendment Bill repealed Labour's Electoral Finance Act and reinstated the old Electoral Act as an interim measure.

Local Government (Auckland Reorganisation) Bill was the first of three bills for the new Super City in Auckland. It provided for the end-date of the previous city councils, set up the Auckland Transition Agency to manage the change, and restricted the powers of the city councils until the new Auckland Council was born.

Corrections (Use of Court Cells) Amendment Bill allowed court cells to be used to house prisoners as a last resort.

Policing (Constable's Oaths Validation) Amendment Bill was a technical bill to retrospectively validate the oaths of a swathe of police officers following a change in the swearing-in procedure.

Environment Canterbury (Temporary Commissioners and Improved Water Management) Bill replaced Environment Canterbury's elected council with government appointed commissioners until 2013. Gave powers to impose a moratorium on water and discharge permits.

Immigration Act 2009 Amendment Bill brought forward the date at which implementation work could start on changes from new Immigration Act, including set up of Immigration and Protection Tribunal.

Excise and Excise-equivalent Duties Table (Tobacco Products) Amendment Bill increased tobacco tax in three stages.

Taxation (Budget Measures) Bill increased GST to 15 per cent and cut income taxes.

Civil Aviation (Cape Town Convention and Other Matters) Amendment Bill aligned NZ law with international Convention on International Interests in Mobile Equipment (the Cape Town Convention).

Policing (Involvement in Local Authority Elections) Amendment Bill allowed police officers to run for local council and be councillors without having to leave the Police.

Canterbury Earthquake Response Bill gave government greater powers to deal with recovery after the September earthquake. Set up the Canterbury Earthquake Recovery Commission.

Employment Relations (Film Production Work) Amendment Bill so-called Hobbit Bill - specified workers on film productions are independent contractors unless they specifically entered into an employment agreement.

Summary Proceedings Amendment Bill (No 2) made offences such as theft purely summary offences if the property involved was less than $500.

How to trick people into clicking on a headline 101

LIE!

This headline should have gone something like...

 "Everything That You Have Already Read About Sharon Armstrong's Arrest - in Half Arsed English"

New details on how NZ cocaine accused was tricked

Fresh details of how Sharon Armstrong was tricked into attempting to traffic 5 kilograms of cocaine have emerged in the Argentinian press today.

Tabloid newspaper Clarin devoted two pages to the explain the "complicated" case of Armstrong, who was arrested at Buenos Aires airport on April 13 with the drugs concealed in her suitcase.

Under the headline "She says that her love tricked her and now she is in jail for drugs", the popular newspaper described her as the first person to write a Maori dictionary.

It carried pictures of her before arrest, and a police-issued photo after her arrest showing her looking despondent.

The paper revealed that she was supposed to celebrate her 55th birthday with her online lover on a romantic blind date in London.

Clarin's police reporter wrote: "What she did during the week she remained in the city is something that she did not want to talk much.

"The truth is that on Wednesday April 13 1215, when she was about to take the British Airways flight 244 bound for London, was arrested at Ezeiza Airport Security Police (PSA).

"A routine scan of the bag revealed that it had shipped in the luggage had been hidden (very roughly, in a double bottom) three packages with an organic substance. The end result of the inspection it was determined that 5 kilos and 135 grams of cocaine, valued on the European market more than 150,000 euros."

Crucial to Armstrong's chances of receiving a lenient sentence will be what she told Customs officials about the suitcase which contained 5.135kgs concealed.

It said: "When assessing the legal situation the key will be her explanation of how the bag came to be in her hands. Was it really yours? Did she switch bags? Did a friend of his virtual love he gave in Buenos Aires with an excuse? For now, Sharon does not want to talk about this with the press."

In an opinion piece accompanying the article, Hector Gambini wrote that her story was believable.

"In New Zealand no one seems to doubt the women, a well respected academic and cultural.

"It is likely that she met someone online and agreed with him a romantic blind date in London.

"So is that your virtual lover has been asked to, as she travelled, pass through Buenos Aires to pick up a bag for him."

Gambini said that her suspicion was not as great as the adrenaline generated by the impending meeting with her "enamorado virtual".

The paper said she is facing a charge of drug smuggling which carries a term of between 6 and 16 years in jail.

It is the first coverage Armstrong's case has received in the mainstream Argentinian press.

She is currently being held in the Ezaiza women's medium detention centre awaiting a court appearance.

Between 2006 and 2010, the Airport Security Police arrested 762 "mules", mainly at the Buenos Aires International Airport.

There were 158 Argentinians, 137 Spanish - by far the most common nationalities.

There were also mules from Bolivia, Paraguay, South Africa, Peru, Italy, and the Netherlands.

The paper said traffickers now prefer to use mules to transport the drug.

The publicity has died down...

The media attention has gone away. The threats of legal action have not been followed through with...but the problem is still there.

The Search for Truth - consequence

That's a pretty gut wrenching read regarding her fight with ACC and Dr. Peter Jansen. A fight that "Jax" is still facing, and will be facing...long after most people have forgotten about the whole story.

I have a feeling that "Jax" will be the victor.

This is a bit sad - Margaret from K Road is gone

Well - Known Street Woman Has Died...

Auckland's best-known street woman has died.

The woman, known as Margaret, has been a presence on Karangahape Rd for at least 20 years, according to the Heritage Manager of the K Rd Business Association, Edward Bennett.

"I was looking at old photographs of K Rd, and one that had been taken in about 1988. There sitting in front of the building was Margaret."

Bennett says Margaret has no known last name, and he understands police are currently trying to track down any possible relatives.

He did not know how she died.

"I understand she was found yesterday. She had been in hospital last year for some time because of numerous medical things. She had been getting noticeably thin lately."

Bennett says Margaret was not homeless, based on what she had told him.

"As I understand, from what she said when I'd spoken to her a number of years ago, she actually lived in a unit in Parnell."

As yet there are no funeral plans for Margaret.

"I have informed Methodist Church here on Pitt St and K Rd but I don't know. I assume something will develop."

Sofia Mella of the tattoo parlour The Tattooed Heart on Karangahape Rd says she has known Margaret for 16 years.

"I didn't know her-know her. We started chatting this year because she started looking a bit worse for wear and everybody was hoping to help her out a little bit I suppose," she says.

"In the last few years I'd say she mellowed a lot. When I was a teenager she used to scream at me a lot. She hasn't done that for quite along time."

Mella, who wrote a blog post about Margaret's death, says she was a big part of the K Rd community.

"My landlord Glen who owns the building the Tattooed Heart is in has been talking for quite a long time about getting a bronze sculpture made of Margaret sitting in that seat. She's such an icon. It's super sad."

Aucklanders also took to Twitter to show their respect for Margaret, with many wishing her peace or remembering encounters with her.

Peter Fogarty wrote: " R.I.P Margaret, you wild woman, I hope you enjoyed all the cigarettes we gave you."

Ying Kong wrote: " RIP Margaret. You were one of K'rd's finest."

That was Margaret in 2007.

I found this rather moving eulogy in her honour this afternoon, as well.

Stop the Clocks - Margaret Has Gone.

I never spent much time in K Road, despite the fact that i lived just down the road. Every once in awhile i would venture up there to browse the second hand shops - there is a fantastic one called The Paper Bag Princess that i used to like to visit. The knick knacky Asian shops were always good for finding things that were labelled with expensive brand names - for $2 dollars, as well. I think i still have some of that MAC brand makeup that those shops sold. I am sure that just having the brand on the packaging made me look so much better...nevermind what product was actually in the container.

I think K Road and the people that frequent that area, started to scare me around the same time, that i offered to drive Denise - the old drug addict that i used to refer to as "The Witch" - cause she looked like one - up to K Road because i was worried about her walking up there by herself to sell drugs. I ended up sitting in the driver's side of my car with three trannies in the back seat, wondering how long it was going to be before this drug deal goes wrong, and i get a size 12 stiletto in the temple.

Yeahhhhh that was pretty much, more than enough of K Road, and the whole atmosphere that it has going on, for me. I never got a stiletto in the temple, Denise, the witch successfully completed her drug deal, and i stuck to only ducking into K Road at 1am to visit one of the many dairies that sell crack pipes, after that.

I found it to be a rather scary place. I wonder what the attraction was for Margaret.

Live Between The Steps

"This is the day the Lord has made" - Psalm 118:24 NKJV

There's a built-in danger in goal setting. What is it? It's believing we'll only be happy when we reach those goals. We tell ourselves, 'When I graduate, get married, have children, own my own home', and so on, so we keep postponing life.

A university professor tells of being invited to speak at a military base and meeting a soldier named Ralph at the airport. After they introduced themselves they headed towards baggage claim. As they walked down the concourse Ralph kept disappearing, once to help an older woman whose suitcase had fallen open, once to lift up two toddlers so they could see Santa Claus, and again to give directions to someone who was lost.

Each time he came back with a big smile on his face. 'Where did you learn to live like that?' the professor asked. 'Oh,' Ralph said, 'during the war, I guess.' Then he told the professor about his last tour of duty, how it was his job to detect mines, and how he watched his friends blown up before his eyes, one after another. 'I learned to live between steps,' he said. 'I never knew whether the next step would be my last, so I learned to get everything I could out of the moment between when I picked up my foot and put it down again. Every step I took was a whole new world, and I guess I've been living that way ever since.'

Ralph had it right! To get the most out of living we must live by the Scripture: 'This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.'

 Love it. :)

Sharon Armstrong and the lesser of two evils...

NZ cocaine accused maintains her innocence

Apparently Sharon Armstrong is refusing to talk about, or name the people that had set her up.

I just have to ask. Which would you choose?

A 15 year prison sentence for drug smuggling when you are actually innocent? Or the remote possibility that a gang of Mr Asia like drug lords might hunt you down and actually get away with it, here in New Zealand?

Personally - i would take my chances with the drug lords - but that's just me. Two hours in a jail cell for something that i WAS guilty of, was more than long enough for me. I can't imagine spending 15 years in a South American prison for something that i had not done.

I am thinking i would also like the people who had set me up, caught - if for no other reason than to ensure that they were unable to do this kind of thing to anyone else, ever again. But that too...is just me.

What would you do?

A terrified Sharon Armstrong, arrested in Argentina almost two weeks ago trying to board a plane with 5kg of cocaine hidden in a suitcase, maintains her innocence despite reports she was caught with multiple driver's licences.

Ms Armstrong, 54, a former Maori Language Commission deputy chief executive, was arrested on April 13 after Buenos Aires Airport police allegedly found the cocaine hidden in her suitcase.

Ms Armstrong has said she did not know about the drugs and was tricked by a man she met online.

She is being held in a medium-security women's detention centre in Ezeiza, about 30km south west of Buenos Aires, and was expected to make her first court appearance this week.

Speaking to NZPA from jail today (NZ time), Ms Armstrong said she needed help but was reluctant to talk about her case because she feared for her safety.

"I'm just a little bit concerned that this might be a lot bigger. I've never been involved in anything like this ever before."

She refused to name the man who she says scammed her.

"I'm not wanting to protect him, but I'm not prepared to name any names for fear of any retribution."

Ms Armstrong denied reports she was carrying four driver's licences when arrested.

She told NZPA she had three licences - New Zealand, Australian, and Cook Islands - with her at the time.

She said the Australian licence was for when she visited family, and the $10 Cook Islands licence had expired.

"Those are the only licences I have. Someone from inside the police must have given this information and that really concerns me.

"I'm not a criminal. This information is wrong."

She would not comment further. "You need to understand that I might not be safe," Ms Armstrong said crying.

She was adamant that she played no part in the drug smuggling.

"I did not know that I had that (the drugs) on me. I didn't know."

She said her time at the detention centre had been difficult, but her family and friends were giving her strength.

Staff from the New Zealand Embassy in Buenos Aires had visited her in prison and had given her a Spanish dictionary, magazines and writing paper so she could write a journal.

The embassy would continue to liaise with Argentine authorities and Ms Armstrong's family.

A former colleague of Ms Armstrong earlier told NZPA friends and family were concerned about her health.

Ms Armstrong had been hospital with heart problems about a year ago and had also had breathing problems, former chief executive of the Maori Language Commission, Haami Piripi said.

"We are very anxious to make sure that she gets the medications for her health problems," Mr Piripi said.

Close friends and family were setting up a defence fund to help her in what could be a long legal process, he said.

Some family and friends had planned to travel over to Argentina but had been advised they would not be able to visit her until the authorities gave the all clear.

He said Ms Armstrong was living a "lonely existence" and her friends were working on finding a way of communicating with her "to help her keep her sanity".

Take the First Step

"Jesus said 'Get up!'" - John 5:8 NIV

At the pool of Bethesda Jesus was drawn to a man who'd been physically incapacitated for 38 years and couldn't walk. That's a long time to wait for things to change. Many of us would have given up. 'When Jesus... asked... "Do you want to get well?"... [he] replied, "I have no one to help me... While I am trying to get in, someone else goes... ahead of me." Then Jesus said... "Get up! Pick up your mat and walk"' (vv. 6-8 NIV).

How do you see yourself? As a helpless victim? Wendy Blight says, 'I lived like that... for a decade. At 21 I was raped by a masked stranger hiding in my apartment. Before that I loved life. I'd just completed college... graduated with honours... become engaged to a wonderful man... and had an amazing job waiting for me... My attacker's... act shattered my hopes and dreams. I lived in a prison of fear and despair. Then I encountered Christ... the words He spoke... pierced my soul. I... was the man on that mat... accustomed to my place of sorrow... I enjoyed being the victim... I was comfortable.

The Bible says, '... The Word of God is living and active... it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart' (Hebrews 4:12 NIV) and it spoke personally to me. I knew I needed to take the first step. I surrendered my fear, pity, and grief... I learned God had a plan for my life and a purpose for my pain. However, I'd never see it until I had the courage to get up and walk.

If you're on the mat... open God's Word. Let Him speak... promises of hope and healing. Before you can get off the mat, you must surrender your fear, self-pity, and despair. Will you do it?'

I ADORE this.  I am a shocker. I have very little time for victims.

On that note - i have been struck down by the flu - whooooaaaaa is me i think i can see a light beckoning me. ;)

It's a wonderful day out there, to be spent in bed anyway.

Tiki Taane - Losing respect...and fans?

Police get angry rap from Tiki

Chart-topping singer Tiki Taane last night lashed out at police, saying the charges against him were "a crock of s**t".

The singer also took aim at National MP Simon Bridges, saying "The next time you come for me you better not miss". Bridges labelled Taane a "disgrace" after the singer recited derogatory lyrics about police on the night of his arrest.

Performing at the Sonic Waves Music Festival near Whangamata, Taane said he had been forced by police to sign a disclaimer not to incite violence.

He has written a song called Freedom to Sing about his arrest in Tauranga.

Taane was arrested after singing NWA track F*** Tha Police when police visited the Illuminati club.

 

John Lennon might be an example to use here of why artists - especially talented ones like Tiki should not involve themselves in politics, or other matters of public opinion.

We might all believe in our right to free speech - just as Lennon believed in peace - but most times artists have to decide what they want to be - a successful artist - or a political activist. Both don't usually work because political opinion is too polarising.

I hope Tiki realises that there are a lot more people out there that are law abiding, and don't think F*ck the Police, than there are people that agree with that sentiment. If those people keep reading articles like today's - he will lose those fans. Just like John Lennon did.

There is a fine line between freedom of speech, and just being plain dumb, and Tiki has crossed it. Whether that is illegal or not is anyone's guess, because all we know is what the media are reporting, and what Tiki is telling us.

Hopefully this goes away, and Tiki goes back to focussing on what he is good at - music.

Natalia Burgess - Ew, what a weirdo

Who would do this? I blogged about this last week when i first heard about it.

Good to see that David Fisher and the Herald on Sunday's Facebooking detective skills are still up to scratch! It was David Fisher and Bevan Hurely who managed to find out where i lived through my Facebook account!

You can run, but you cannot hide from those two! haha

Here is what can be found on Natalia's Facebook Wall.

Natalie Burgess the creepy internet stalker of high school boys doing her duck face!

This is the real face of the woman accused of being a Facebook predator.

Natalia Burgess, 28, of Mangere in Auckland, has assumed multiple false online personalities to form internet relationships with teenagers.

Her identity has so far remained a secret as she stayed hidden behind a web of online personas.

But the Herald on Sunday was able to penetrate her attempts to disguise her identity - and discovered she is known to police.

We have found Burgess has at least six other online personas including: Laura Jane West, Jordz Williams, Becca Maria Jullienne, Abby Jane Zoe William and Racheal Marie Drent.

The personas were bolstered by photos taken from the Facebook profiles of genuine people.

Burgess was unwilling to comment yesterday.

A man who answered her phone said: "We're not doing anything unless it goes through the lawyer."

Over a year, Burgess used her multiple online personalities to form internet relationships with dozens of teenage boys and men across the country.

Almost 40 boys at St Thomas of Canterbury school in Christchurch were caught up, along with dozens of others.

Many believed they were in relationships with attractive girls their own age.

She would arrange to pay for some to have their mobile telephones topped up with credit - and they would spend hours through the night talking to her.

Along the way, the Herald on Sunday has found Burgess also pretended to be a family member of murdered Christchurch woman Emma Agnew and set up an internet memorial page expressing her grief.

We have also found she pretended her father was among the 29 men killed in the Pike River mining disaster.

One of her fake profiles - Laura Jane West - posted a bereavement message that read: "I miss you and I will never stop loving you, R..i.p daddy terry xx."

The only miner to have lost his life with that first name was Terry Kitchin.

His family last night said he had three children and none carried the name Laura West. They also did not know Burgess.

The Herald on Sunday has learned that Burgess grew up in Westport as the adopted daughter of a religious family. Friends say she stood out in the town being Samoan by birth but adopted into a European family.

The Herald on Sunday has also been told by some caught up in the scam that they spent hours on the phone to Burgess or the personas which have emerged as fakes.

Burgess would also play the false personalities off against each other - having them arguing online over rights to various boys and men.

Victims have also told how the false personas would be used to back up each other's stories - including one case in which a young man was told over the internet of a false persona committing suicide.

He believed the woman was real and had killed herself in despair over a relationship gone wrong.

Burgess then set up RIP memorial internet pages - and used as tributes online videos made in homage by an eager suitor.

The revelation of her identity comes as police finish interviewing many of the boys at St Thomas of Canterbury who fell victim to her scam.

Youth division senior sergeant John Robinson said the case would be reviewed by lawyers to see if any law had been broken. No one was facing charges yet.

Robinson - who would not address Burgess by name - said the law around "grooming" by online predators was being studied.

Police had previously said they believed a sexual motive lay behind the fake Facebook relationships.

He said there had been air tickets sent to schoolboys to get them from Christchurch to Auckland. The trips had not gone ahead after parents became involved, although one trip to visit a persona who had made a "suicide attempt" almost did.

Robinson said reluctance on the part of the victims had also resulted in threats toward family members by the various personas used. The nature of the threats showed the person controlling the personas had a large reserve of knowledge drawn from the internet.

"The lesson in this is be careful what you put out there. We want people talking about this a lot more than they are," said Robinson.

He said rules around keeping computers in a central family area no longer applied when mobile phones allowed internet connections anywhere. It meant parents needed to have more open conversations about internet dangers with their children, he said.

Motueka youth leader Ethan Williams, 18, said he formed an online friendship with Laura Jane West last year - and was then introduced to her "sisters" Burgess and Jullienne.

He said the Jullienne persona claimed to be the sister of Anna Jullienne, who plays Nurse Maia Jeffries on Shortland Street.

Each of the personas had different photos accompanying their online biographies and Facebook pages.

While in the online relationship, Williams made videos as a tribute to their relationship and his friendship with her "sisters". The Herald on Sunday showed him yesterday that his videos were linked to online obituary pages for the women.

"This is crazy," he said, seeing the pages. "Who would go to this much effort? I feel like a complete idiot.

"It's like an episode of Shortland Street. They get sick of someone so they kill them off."

Williams said he was told by Burgess she was 23 and on home detention for an assault-related conviction.

The online relationship started breaking down after about a month. Williams said he also became suspicious of inconsistencies in the stories.

"It got really weird. Natalia and Becca started threatening other friends over Facebook."

Correspondence provided by Williams showed Burgess threatening to "smash" a female friend that he knew in real life, not just over the internet.

Student Kyle Lawson, 21, said one of the personas told him another had committed suicide.

"One of them told me she had walked into a house and the other one had killed herself over some guy."

Lawson said: "It reinforces everything you get told about the internet. You've got to be careful with Facebook. You don't know who's on the other side."

Hamilton's Toni Hanham's photos were used as part of the scam - and then featured on a memorial "RIP" page. She said her friend's Facebook profiles had been searched for new photos of her used to support false identities.

"It was a shock - you can't even believe that it happened. It's actually horrible," said Hanham.

"I figured her to not be very attractive if she has to use other people's photographs to get attention."

Sharon Armstrong - Getting harder to believe...

'I've never been arrested before' | Stuff

With each passing news story, Sharon Armstrong's alibi - or story that she had been conned - gets less and less believable...

Former high-ranking public servant and probation officer Sharon Armstrong had never fallen foul of the law before she was arrested, accused of cocaine smuggling and thrown in an Argentinian prison.

"I've never, ever been arrested," she said tearfully as she spoke to The Dominion Post from jail.

The 54-year-old mother-of-one and former deputy chief executive of the Maori Language Commission was stopped at Ezeiza International Airport in Buenos Aires on April 13.

A security scan had discovered more than five kilograms of cocaine concealed in the bottom of her locally made suitcase.

Airport police later confiscated Australian, American and Argentinian currency and four driver's licences from her personal belongings.

She had arrived in Buenos Aires a week earlier and told The Dominion Post she spent the week sightseeing.

"Oh God, I feel so foolish," she said, speaking from the medium-security Federal Centre of Detention for Women.

Armstrong's family are adamant she has been scammed by a man she met on an online dating site.

"There is no way on earth she would do this," her niece Kapoi Mathieson said. "Her whole family are all so very supportive of her and will continue to be, because we know this is a tragedy.

"She has been taken in by a guy who is a cad, a total cad."

For several months before her arrest, Armstrong had been emailing and Skyping a man she met on the internet. She had arranged to travel to London to meet him, but, at the last moment, he changed her flights to go via Argentina.

He asked her to pick up some documents he needed for a new job and paid for her flight. She has not heard from him since her arrest.

Her advice to those considering internet dating: "Be very careful. Don't believe all you're told."

Armstrong maintains she did not know the cocaine was in her suitcase.

Waiting in prison for a court date, she is frightened about her future.

"What frightens me is the people I got involved in know who I am and if I say too much, I'm concerned for my safety.

"I think the scariest thing for me is I'm just out of my depth, I don't know this world."

New Zealand embassy staff visited Armstrong on Wednesday local time, bringing magazines and writing paper. "I'm starting to keep a journal, writing to my family, just writing everything."

She has no watch, but tells the time of day by the monotony of prison routine.

"Usually I think the first sort of call is at half past 7. They sort of do a check at 8. They come and count the number of women, make sure we're all here – not that I'd know where we could go."

About midday they have their first meal, with more food in the evening.

She shares her cell with 18 other women – only one of whom speaks English – and wears clothes given to her by the prison.

"I have my own jeans, that's about it."

She has been allocated a lawyer from the public defenders' office who does not speak English. She is yet to appear in court and is expected to make her first court appearance next week.

She refused to comment on reports she was carrying four driver's licences when she was arrested.

She said she had heard horror stories about corruption in the prison system.

"You know, if you've got money, you can buy your way out. But I would never put my family through that."

It was her family who had been keeping her sane, she said. "I'm taking it day by day. Some days are better than others.

"The first few days were like hell but you know I just have to get strong. I have to get out of here, that's all I can think of really. I just may have to do my time. I don't know."

A former colleague said Ms Armstrong was "street-smart"and after eight years working as a probation officer would be hard to fool.

"You don't work with criminals and be gullible after all those years," he told the Taranaki Daily News.

"She is a street-smart, savvy woman. I just can't imagine her being conned."

On the same day that Armstrong was arrested, Argentinian authorities announced they had intercepted a total of 32 kilograms of cocaine. Much of the haul had been stopped by police at Ezeiza International Airport between April 8 and April 13, business journal Diario El Comercial reported.

I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. Her explanation regarding an online romance and being conned sounded plausible. Women - and men - but women more so, do stupid things when they think they are in love. Heck, i have done some REALLY stupid things in the past.

I wanted to believe that this was nothing more than a tragic story about a lonely, middle aged woman having such a low self esteem that she didn't think there might be a suitable partner for her here in NZ, so she went searching for some unobtainable thing that she thought might make her feel good about herself - and loved - on the other side of the world.

But...and this is a BIG but...she was a probation officer for 8 years! I struggle to believe that a probation officer could get duped like this. I have met a few probation officers over the past couple of years, and i have never met one that i thought i could pull the wool over their eyes. I never met one that i thought was stupid. I never met one that was not streetwise and had not very obviously  heard every lie, and excuse in the book.

The fact that she was a probation officer for 8 years, makes this story even more dodgy and unbelievable than the fact that she was carrying 4 different drivers licenses, and contrary to original reports that she had just popped in to Buenos Aries to collect some papers - she had spent a week there sightseeing.

I'm sorry, but if you have met who you think is the love of your life on the internet, and you are travelling across the globe to meet this person, and live happily ever after - in love - you don't take a week long detour on the way to meet him to sight see prior to meeting him. The excitement of meeting your new love in person, and having the whole situation be real would mean that any sight seeing done on the way would be nothing more than a delay on your road to love and happiness.

That is a purely romantic perspective - which is the perspective that one has to take if we are expected to believe her story - that she was conned by an internet love interest, and that all women do silly things. (especially self described silly old women...)

I am rapidly losing any belief in Sharon's innocence. Which sucks. I wanted to believe her - for some odd reason.

Scars

"I will not believe it until I put my finger where the nails were" - John 20:25 NCV

In The Odyssey, when Odysseus returns home disguised as an old man, his family doesn't know him. Then his childhood nurse sees a scar she remembers from infancy. Until then, even she doesn't recognise him. When Thomas heard Jesus was alive, he said, '... "I will not believe it until I... put my finger where the nails were"... ' Jesus' scars were proof-positive He'd been crucified and resurrected. When Thomas checked them out for himself, he responded, '"My Lord and my God!"' (v. 28). It's the first time Scripture records a disciple directly addressing Jesus as God, and it came in response to seeing His scars.

We all have scars. Dr Will Willimon says, 'I've a friend who spent... his life in an orphanage. His mother took him there as a boy, left him out under a big cedar tree, told him she'd return that afternoon, but didn't. He's now middle-aged. One day I was to meet him for lunch and I was late... I found him in a state of agitation, pacing about, perspiring, visibly upset... Later he said, "I can't help it. I get bent out of shape when a friend is late, because my mother kept me waiting... and never returned." He was all grown up... but he still had scars... You've got your scars, some visible, some invisible, some more visible with age. The Risen Christ also has scars to prove his love for you. If you don't know him, or like Thomas, if you aren't sure you believe, he'll show you his scars '... that you may believe... and... by believing you may have life in his name' (John 20:31 NIV).

 I adore that. How awesome.

We drove back home from The Mount yesterday. I figured that if we were going to be stuck inside, due to the rain, we were better off being stuck inside - bored - in the comfort of our own home! The drive was a bit of a mission. There was a ton of traffic and the drive through queue at McDonalds in Matamata was ridiculously long. Shame on me for bribing the girls with McDonalds for lunch in order to get them to agree to head home!

The line of traffic from the Thames turn off, heading South was crawling all the way back to Razorback Rd. It was crazy! I felt very fortunate to be heading North. Nearly got out my phone to video all the cars we were speeding past, but then i thought better of playing with my phone while driving. So just how bad it was will have to be left up to your imagination! It was bad though. I always feel sorry for people when i see them stuck in traffic on a public holiday. We spend every day of our lives in traffic! Well us Aucklanders do anyway.

I am over the moon with joy at the moment. It is 10am and i have just dropped the girls at Sylvia Park,. They wanted to be there early to get to all the Easter sales...and Billy is off at some X box competition for the day....Guess what THAT means?!?!?! I have my whole house all to myself for a few hours!!!! I can't remember the last time i had the house to myself, with nowhere to go, and nothing to do.

I guess it is time to get some cleaning done - in my knickers!!!! Just. Cause. I. Can!

You get another shot!

"Go... tell his disciples... especially Peter" - Mark 16:7

Max Lucado writes, 'I'd read the passage a hundred times, but never seen it. Maybe I'd passed over it in the excitement of the resurrection... the women's surprise when they find the stone moved... that beautiful phrase by the angel "He is not here, he is risen."

But go a bit further... and enjoy this jewel... "Go... tell his disciples, especially Peter that he will go ahead of you to Galilee"... all of heaven had watched Peter fall, and wanted to help him get back up. "Be sure and tell Peter he's not left out... one failure doesn't make him a flop"...

Not many second chances in the world today... ask the kid who didn't make little (USA) league team... the fellow who got the pink slip... the mother of three who got dumped for a "pretty little thing"... Nowadays it's "Around here we don't tolerate incompetence" or "Not much room at the top" or "Three strikes and you're out" or "It's a dog-eat-dog-world..."

Jesus has a simple answer... "Be sure to tell Peter he gets to bat again." It's not every day you get a second chance. Peter must have known that. The next time he saw Jesus he got so excited that he jumped into the Sea of Galilee! It was also enough to cause this backwoods Galilean to carry the gospel of the second chance to Rome where they killed him.

If you've ever wondered what would make a man willing to be crucified upside down, maybe now you know. It's not every day you find someone who'll give you a second chance - much less someone who'll give you a second chance every day. In Jesus Peter found both.' And you will too!

I am trying very, very hard right now, to find a way to tell the girls that it is going to rain down here at the Mount the WHOLE of Easter weekend, and that if we are going to be stuck inside, bored due to the rain, then we might as well be at home.

For some reason they think that there will still be boatloads of teenage boys running wild outside, and that the surf lifesaving  boys will be out training like they were in January - in HURRICANE conditions.

From what i understand, after hearing from friends from just about everywhere in the country except the Bay of Plenty - it is beautiful, hot, and sunny - everywhere - BUT HERE!

Time to head back home. I am feeling slothy for not running for the past two days, and just being stuck inside. Not good.

What an absolute nightmare

'This is just so shameful' - national Stuff.co.nz

A distraught Sharon Armstrong says she was duped into smuggling five kilograms of cocaine by an online lover.

"Oh God, I feel so foolish," she told The Dominion Post from her Argentinian cell yesterday. "You know I've worked for the government for 20 years. I've just been a silly old lady. Silly, silly, silly and too trusting. I've been scammed. This is just so shameful."

Friends and family say her arrest is out of character and believe Ms Armstrong, 54, is the victim of an online dating scam.

The former deputy chief executive of the Maori Language Commission had been a contractor at Wellington Maori education and language company Haemata since February.

An Argentinian official said she was arrested on April 13 as she was waiting to board British Airways flight BA2444 to London.

The cocaine was found after she had checked in her baggage, the official said. A security scan revealed the cocaine concealed by a false bottom in her suitcase.

For several months, Ms Armstrong had been exchanging emails and chatting on Skype with a man she had met online.

She was due to travel to London to meet him but, at the last minute, her flights were changed to go via Argentina, where the man reportedly asked her to pick up some documents relating to a new job.

Friends and family repeatedly warned Ms Armstrong it could be a scam. But the man had put about $1000 toward the cost of the altered tickets, and she thought he was legitimate. She has not heard from him since her arrest.

She is being held at the medium-security Federal Centre of Detention for Women in Ezeiza, Buenos Aires. Conditions in the prison, which houses about 230 inmates, were "just passable", she said.

The screams and yells of other prisoners could be heard as she spoke tearfully of her arrest: "Oh God, this is my worst nightmare."

She broke down several times.

Ms Armstrong said she had spoken to her family from prison and been allocated a lawyer from the public defenders' office, but the woman did not speak English.

"I've only seen her once. I met the lawyer and a person who could speak a bit of English last Thursday and, oh God ... they had a translator and I gave a statement and told them everything I could tell them."

She was yet to appear in court. "It's hard to really know exactly what's happening. I'm supposed to go back and see them within 10 days and the judge will give his first judgment."

Only one other woman in her unit spoke English. "It's hard ... I don't know if I will still be here tomorrow. I am supposed to be moved to the English-speaking area of the prison."

She had been told the justice system in Buenos Aires was rife with bribery. "I'm hearing all sorts of horror stories about how corrupt things are here. You know, if you've got money, you can buy your way out. But I would never put my family through that."

She had one message for her family: "I'm so sorry for what has happened."

Ms Armstrong's cousin, Kapoi Mathieson, said: "There is no way on earth she would do this.

"Her whole family are all so very supportive of her and will continue to be, because we know this is [a] tragedy. She has been taken in by a guy who is a cad, a total cad."

A spokeswoman for the Foreign Affairs and Trade Ministry said the embassy in Buenos Aires was told of the arrest on April 14.

Embassy staff were in contact with Ms Armstrong and would visit her on Wednesday, local time. "This is the earliest embassy staff were permitted to visit."

Staff would provide a list of English-speaking lawyers and essential items bought for or donated to Ms Armstrong.

"The embassy is liaising with the Argentine authorities and the ministry is in touch with the family."

Maria Paula La Monica, from the Argentinian embassy in Wellington, said Argentina was a democracy and anyone arrested there was entitled to be represented by a lawyer.

"Moreover, if the arrested person does not speak our official language, an interpreter will be provided."

Ms Armstrong, 54, was a probation officer in New Plymouth from 1990 to 1998. A former colleague said yesterday: "You don't work with criminals and be gullible after all those years.

"I just can't imagine her being conned."

PRISON CONDITIONS IN BUENOS AIRES

Prison conditions are generally poor, with extreme overcrowding, poor nutrition and sanitation, inadequate medical treatment, limited family visits and frequent degrading behaviour, according to various human rights groups.

Beatings, the use of a cattle prod, cold showers and forced isolation are common, says one report.

The law allows for "investigative detention" of up to two years for people awaiting or undergoing trial. Prisoners wait an average of three years to be tried.

Anyone who transports narcotics can receive a four to 15-year term of "rigorous imprisonment".

Ugh - this is an absolutely horrible story. If any of us are feeling down, lonely, sad, or hopeless, all we really need to do is just imagine for a second, how terrible the situation that Sharon is in right now...is. If that doesn't make you feel grateful about your lot in life - nothing will.

I can't help though, but wonder what on Earth she was thinking??? Who needs to pay a grand to have someone go and collect papers for a new job? Has she never heard of posting something in the mail? Courier? Email? No one PAYS to go and collect papers from anywhere. How could a seemingly intelligent woman think that was a normal request?

I have a very good friend, who has been chatting to, and doing the whole online romance thing for about a year now, with a guy that lives in London. They met on Facebook. I keep telling her over and over, how we never really know anyone that we have met online, and never met in person. Heck, we don't REALLY know some of the people that we have met in person...heck i didn't even REALLY know someone that i was married to.

People have to be so careful these days. People can be whoever they want to be on internet dating sites, and social networking sites. I keep telling my friend that for all she knows this guy that she has been emailing and chatting to, is an old fat woman - or a bored 12 year old.

We just never know. It is just crazy. We only have ourselves to blame though - if we don't listen to our gut, or our intuition, or we just ignore common sense, in our pursuits of love. Being single can be lonely at times, but i think i would take lonely, over deceived - Any. Day.

Trust God And Keep Going

"Gideon crossed over, exhausted but still in pursuit" - Judges 8:4 NKJV

Are you thinking of quitting? You believed you could make a difference until they poured criticism and cold water on you. At that point you decided it was easier to adjust your expectations to their opinion and just keep smiling.

Don't do it; God has too much invested in you! The comfort zone is for those who are exempt from pain but denied progress; protected from failure but held in the grip of mediocrity. Get up and get out of there while you still can: '... Strengthen the things which remain, that are ready to die... ' (Revelation 3:2 NKJV).

Open your Bible and begin to fill your mind with God's promises; they're powerful motivators. Pray, believing God for great things. Plug in at church. Rekindle your desire, for ultimately that's what determines your destiny! Jesus suffered the loss of His disciples, His friends, and even His clothes (John 19:23-24). But they couldn't rob Him of '... the joy that was set before him... ' (Hebrews 12:2 NKJV). Even while He was dying He continued to minister. Then He went into hell, came out with the lock and keys and announced, 'I am He who lives, and was dead, and behold, I am alive forevermore... ' (Revelation 1:18 NKJV). And He is your example!


When Gideon fought the Midianites we read that he '... came to the Jordan, he and the three hundred men who were with him crossed over, exhausted but still in pursuit'. Because Gideon refused to let the Jordan River intimidate him, or fatigue stop him, God gave him a great victory! And He will do the same for you.

I had an absolutely wonderful sleep overnight. I always sleep so well down here. The drive down was easy and hassle free as well. There was a little bit more traffic on the roads, than when a long holiday weekend is not looming, but it wasn't too bad and most likely nothing compared to what trying to get out of Auckland today will be like!

We arrived down here about 6pm...Nicky and Ange had been drinking since 11am!!??!! by that stage. It was Ange's birthday yesterday, but because of needing new tyres etc, we missed that. Not sure i could have handled another big day like that anyway. I can't keep up with those girls anymore. I did enjoy one glass of wine with Ange, before being Nicky's sober diver home! Nix managed to scoff some fish and chips just before passing out about 8pm.

I was tempted to record the snoring that i could hear coming from her and Craig's bedroom, but i resisted on the basis that me recording the girls' drunk singing last week was probably enough embarrassment - for this month.

Needless to say though, that i did not much struggle with the usual feeling that i get when i am down here sometimes - you know - that feeling that us single people get when we are surrounded by happy couples. Yeah that feeling. I did not get it last night while i listened to TWO very loud snorers in the next room.

Still - i had a fantastic sleep and am ready to drop my little monsters (Nicole and Lydia) off at the mall...then head off to climb the mount! I don't think i will even bother suggesting the idea to Nicky. I think she will be struggling to get out of bed today. I might get clobbered if i suggest she climb the mount with me. lol

I ADORE my life - MOST of the time. ;)

Road Trip Time!

I love the opportunity to share this link. lol



I hope everyone else that is hitting the road this long weekend, will have safe and happy travels. :)

Worthless Teenagers and the Parents who Make Them

Worthless Teenagers and the Parents who Make Them

I love this guy's blog...LONG - but worth the read.

The following is an email I recently received.

“dear dan, i am 16 and i was wondering if you could help me know what to do, cause i am at the point that i hate myself and anybody else and i feel like theres no hope and i thought that you might be able to give me some advise since you are good at stuff like that. my mom is always screeming at me and her and my dad don’t love me and i don’t know why cause i try to do everything i can and i'm not a bad kid but they always tell me i am in fact my mom today sayd that i am one of gods biggest mistakes cause i slept threw my alarm and missed my bus. my dad doesnt ever hit me but he is always calling me an idiot or a retard or stuff like that. anyway at school i don’t really have very many friends cause i'm to shy i guess. i don’t know what to do cause i am just wanting to give up even trying anymore cause why should i? have you ever felt like nobody cares if you just disappear cause i really feel that way even with my parents.”

It kept going, but you get the gist.

I got that email a week ago. I cried. It was definitely a “last straw” moment for me.

It’s days like that when I hate opening my inbox. Those days when monstrosities lurk within that completely anger or sadden me. I’ve received at least thirty or forty emails like it in the past seven months. All from teenagers. All from broken, hurting, sad teenagers. My heart has weakened a little more with each and every one of them. In truth, I always feel so lost when I get them. I mean, what can I do other than offer encouraging words in response while I sit on the sidelines being a useless cheerleader for the wounded and bleeding?

[sigh] Today’s post is a long time coming, far overdue, and is probably among the most difficult that I’ve written for a lot of different reasons, most of which are personal to me, some of which will become easily apparent as you continue reading.

Forgive the anger in my voice today. I feel that some strong things need to be said, and I admittedly wrote this post while I was lost in heavy ire over a slew of different things that were going on. I pray that I can speak at least a few words that will make these parents who continue breaking their teenagers stop and think for a damned minute. Because, we have a problem.

Teenagers are idiots.

Teenagers are careless.

Teenagers are stupid.

Teenagers are reckless.

Teenagers are less than beautiful.

Teenagers don’t care enough about the things that matter.

Teenagers care too much about the things that don’t matter.

Teenagers are thoughtless.

Teenagers are inconsiderate.

Teenagers are rude.

Teenagers don’t work hard enough.

Teenagers don’t have their priorities straight.

Teenagers spend too much time thinking about love.

Teenagers don’t spend enough time thinking about school.

Teenagers love to sass and talk back to their parents.

Teenagers love to argue.

Teenagers don’t take care of themselves.

Teenagers are quitters.

Teenagers are lazy.

Teenagers don’t spend enough time with their families.

Teenagers spend far too much time with the wrong people.

Teenagers are walking hormones.

Teenagers are always one mistake away from destroying their lives.

Teenagers are always one bad decision away from premature parenthood.

Teenagers are always one bad decision away from lives ruined with drugs or alcohol.

Teenagers don’t really care about religion.

Teenagers don’t really care about spirituality at all.

Teenagers don’t care what their parents think.

Teenagers don’t want to talk to their parents.

Teenagers are shut off. They are distant. They are uncaring.

Teenagers are, simply put, worthless.

Parents, why the hell do you make life so impossible for your teenagers? Why do you work to make them feel so damned worthless? Why do you set them up for constant failure? Why do you continually labor to strip away every good chance your teenagers have to be everything you demand so regularly that they be?

Do you not get that the world is waiting for them with open jaws, ready to chew them up and spit them out, and that it will not hesitate any time it has the opportunity to do so? Do you not get that around every corner lies hard and inescapable lessons for your teenager? Do you not get that the last place from which your teenagers need to be getting this kind of crap is from you? In your home?

Come on.

You were a teenager once.

Do you not remember how incredibly frustrating, yet distantly conquerable the world was to you then? Do you not remember how difficult finding that delicate balance between your parents, school, your friends, your teachers, and the entire rest of life was? Do you not remember how badly you longed for freedom to really be who you believed yourself to be? To really do what you believed you could do?

I was a teenager once too, and I hated myself, especially as a younger teen. I hated my parents. I hated my family. I hated my peers. I hated my teachers. I hated everybody.

Each day I went to bed feeling… worthless. I felt worthless because the channels of love that I knew deep down should be flowing through my human heart were obstructed. They were clogged. Nothing was flowing in or out. I felt worthless because nobody wanted me around. I felt worthless because nobody cared if I ceased to exist. I felt worthless because I was told that it’s what I should be, and I was told it again, and again, and again. By just about everybody.

Over the course of my teenage years, every rock hard, hurtful, and damaging sentiment I listed above, was one that I myself heard, directed at me, by somebody. Often by those who supposedly “loved me.”

And I’m not alone. I’ve received dozens of emails from teenagers about this, but I’ve received hundreds from adults who still carry the hurt, resentment, and anger from what happened to them during their teenage years. The story is almost always the same. My mom. My dad. My siblings. My grandparents. My peers. My leaders. My teachers. They treated me like crap. They hurt me. They were ruthless. They said things that still haunt me. They said things that I still believe. They said things that are still a part of me. They said things that broke me.

And I have to wonder, why? Why do human freaking beings treat each other in such a way? Why do parents treat their children that way? Why does anybody break anybody?

In the end, I realize that it’s all about one thing.

Power.

Who has the power?

A father who constantly unleashes on his child, impugns his child, or hurts his child wants only one thing.

A mother who constantly berates her child, nags her child, punishes her child, or hurts her child wants only one thing.

And, any teenager who talks back, fights back, or pushes back wants only one thing.

They all want the power. Some power. Any power. All power.

Everybody wants to have the power over everybody else and every situation, and far too many people spend their lives trying to maintain the only thing that actually let’s them feel that power.

Control.

The father who thrives on power, works to control everything (whether he can or not) in his child’s life. He works to make sure that his child will always do and be what he thinks is best. He works to make sure that his child rises to some predetermined and idealistic life-station, and simultaneously he also works to make sure that his child never finds the ability to rise above that station. He works to guarantee that his child will be successful in whatever way he believes success is achieved. He works to force respect. He works to force love. He works to force some sense of a relationship.

The mother who thrives on power, works just as dutifully to control everything (whether she can or not) in her child’s life. She works to make sure her child always believes exactly what she believes. She works to make sure her child always learns the lessons that she believes need to be learned. She works to mold her child into the person she believes her child should be molded into. And, just like the power-craving father, she also works to force respect, love, and the non-existent relationship but forced relationship.

But let’s be honest. None of it can be forced. Ever. Maybe it can be faked for a while, but it’s impossible to force.


For the parents who constantly find themselves throwing their arms up in frustration after ugly and recurrent power struggles with their teenagers… I’m going to let you in on a little secret. If you can absorb it, understand it, and believe it, I can promise you this. Your life as the parent of a teenager will improve. You ready for the secret?

You can’t make your teenager believe what you believe, any more than you can make a child fall asleep at naptime.

You can’t make your teenager live the life you want her to live.

You can’t make your teenager respect you.

You can’t make your teenager love you.

And you can’t make your teenager be a part of a relationship, have feelings, or have respect that doesn’t actually exist.

Do you not see? What you can do, and what you almost always will do when you try, is build resentment and bitterness in your teenager. You build apathy. You build wrongly-guided determination. You build a need for independence. You build a need for life experience that doesn’t involve you.

And when your teenagers develop these needs… they will almost always find a way to fulfill those requirements, and you’re probably not going to like the way they go about doing it.

The great irony, of course, is that when teenagers do desperately seek a way to satisfy those needs, parents tend to wrap their children’s actions under one blanketed and nonsensically misleading term. Rebellion. My kid is rebellious. My kid is a typical teenager. My kid has an attitude. My kid doesn’t listen. My kid does the exact opposite of what I tell him to do. It’s always our kid’s fault, and never our own.

Why do parents not get that the sooner they stop trying to control their teenagers with their hurtful words, insults, demands, punishments, schedules, requirements, and actions, the sooner their kids will start stepping up to the plate on their own? Why do parents not get that the sooner they stop trying to force their beliefs onto their children, the sooner their children will actually question those beliefs enough to make them their own? And why do parents not get that the sooner they work toward love instead of for power, the sooner they’ll get love and the less they’ll have any need for power? Why don’t they get that?

The 16-year old girl who sent me the email above has a mother and a father who pursue after the power so relentlessly, and are trying to control having that power and control so consistently, that they are pushing their teenager into dark places that no real parent wants their child to be. And they probably don’t even know they’re doing it. If I had to guess, they’re probably going to their neighborhood barbecues and their soccer games and their Bunco parties, telling their buddies and their girlfriends just how rotten a person their daughter is. They’re probably painting some grim picture of how hard life is for them, parenting such a lost and troubled individual. And here’s the kicker. They’re probably convinced that it’s all true, too.

“i was wondering if you could help me know what to do, cause i am at the point that i hate myself and anybody else and i feel like theres no hope and i thought that you might be able to give me some advise”

Mom and Dad, your need for power has sent your daughter on a search for help across the internet, and into the inbox of a 30-year old man you don’t know from Adam. Is that really what you want?

“my mom is always screeming at me and her and my dad don’t love me and i don’t know why cause i try to do everything i can”

Was the pursuit of power worth it? Your child feels completely unloved by you. Was that your intention? Are you at all aware of this? I’m guessing not. You probably think she deserves everything you always hand out to her. Are you at all aware that your child, deep down, believes she is really trying? I’m guessing not. You probably think she’s a waste of space. Oh wait… you actually do…

“i'm not a bad kid but they always tell me i am in fact my mom today sayd that i am one of gods biggest mistakes cause i slept threw my alarm and missed my bus.”

Your need for power gave you one thing here, Mom. A child who now feels like sleeping through an alarm is one of life’s worst problems. A child, who in all likelihood grasps the infiniteness of God and the universe a lot more than you think she does, and has now taken your words to heart. In fact, she’s internalized them enough that she officially hates herself. But even though you’re dead wrong, maybe you’re right. Maybe your child is one of God’s greatest mistakes. Your desperation to keep your child from missing another bus (aka control) made you say things that made your child believe that. Bravo.

“my dad doesnt ever hit me but he is always calling me an idiot or a retard or stuff like that”

Kudos dad. You’ve trained your daughter well. She officially thinks that being called an idiot or a retard is less hurtful than being physically battered. Next time, maybe you should shut your mouth and just hit your kid. The pain will disappear in minutes instead of decades, and child services will have something more concrete to work with, just be sure to leave a bruise or two. Sticks and stones, old man.

“anyway at school i don’t really have very many friends cause i'm to shy i guess.”

Once again, mad props to both parents. You’ve trained your daughter to believe that she’s shy. But she’s not. Put your iced teas and your noses down, and read the rest of the damn email. She knows that she’s not shy. She also knows that you two have taken away all of her self-confidence. All of her value. All of her spirit. She knows that her problems at school have trickled all the way down from home. And she’s desperate to change the direction of that ugly flow.

“i don’t know what to do cause i am just wanting to give up even trying anymore cause why should i?”

I can’t say I blame you. I can tell you why you shouldn’t give up though. You’re amazing. You’re beautiful. You’re incredible. And there will come a day when you will have the chance to learn that about yourself.

“have you ever felt like nobody cares if you just disappear cause i really feel that way even with my parents.”

Mom and Dad.

Damn it.

You have failed.

So fix it.

Just fix it. I don’t care what it takes. Unbreak your child.

It is not your teenager’s job to learn how to be a better teenager. It is your job to learn how to be a better parent to your teenager. If you can do that, your teenager’s behavior will improve. Your relationship will improve. You’ll start to see truly amazing and jaw-dropping things happen. But it has to start with you. It’s the ultimate and indisputable rule of parenting.

Stop and think for a damned second.

Do you not realize who your teenager is?

Your daughter is smart. Your daughter is beautiful. Your daughter is incredible. Your daughter is bound for great things!

Your son is gifted. Your son is intelligent. Your son is capable of anything. Your son will accomplish the impossible!

Why can’t parents see that they must begin labeling their teenagers with the empowering and beautiful words that will push these kids toward greater things? Why can’t they see that they must declare their confidence and faith in their nearly grown children? Why can’t they see that they must trust those children, even when that trust seems impossible or ill-founded? Why can’t they see that they must stop believing society’s many horrid and false stereotypes of teenagers? Why can’t they see that they must turn the tables on everything so many of us joke and believe teenagers to be?

Why can’t parents see that they must start expecting everything from their teenagers, but demanding nothing?

Maybe they don’t realize who their teenagers are. Maybe they don’t see just how fragile and human their children still are. Maybe they don’t get that there is far more to them than what meets the eye.

I was different than what anybody thought I was. I was more than what anybody believed me to be. I was destined for greater things than anybody ever gave me credit for.

For example, I had a heart that nobody seemed to know about. Somehow, in the midst of the constant hate I was feeling, and in the midst of the deep depression that often overtook me, I was desperate to love. Oh, I was desperate to be loved too, but I was far more desperate to love others. I was far more desperate to move past the consuming anger and hatred that I seemed to permanently feel, and actually love another person the way nobody, I felt at the time, had really loved me.

I was also ambitious. I was also smart. I was also gifted.

I was artistic. I was strong. I was capable. I was faithful. I was beautiful.

I just wanted some power. I needed some power. I needed to control parts of my own life, and nobody would let me. The world worked to make it as impossible as they could for me. And so, feeling completely powerless, I shut myself off, I pushed others away, and I secretly shifted between thoughts of my own extinction and thoughts of the freedom I would one day have if I could just make it to 18. You see, those were the only two ways that I felt I would ever have any power at all. Grow up or give up.

And the truth is, your daughter wants and needs some power, too. Your son wants and needs some power, too. You also want power. But, I ask, what’s the cold and very real difference between your wants and your teenager’s wants? Your teenager wants power over his or her own life. You want power over the life of your teenager. You want power over the life of somebody who is only years or months from jumping into their adult life without you as their controller and superior. Doesn’t that scare you a little bit? Doesn’t it scare you to know that you’re trying to control everything until your child leaves home? Doesn’t it scare you to think about what will happen when that control disappears, basically overnight? Don’t you see the value in controlling your teenager less while you still have a chance and you still have an ultimate say in how things go down?

If you take anything from this post today, I want you to take this. It is okay that your teenager wins sometimes. It is okay that your teenager is right sometimes. It is okay that your teenager thinks for herself. It is okay that they your teenager makes mistakes. It is okay that your teenager botches it up once in awhile. It is okay that your teenager is human.

Everybody needs to win once in a while. Everybody. If you never let your teenagers win, beating you will become the most important thing to them. And they will win; if not now, they’ll win eventually. It’s their life, and one day you’re not going to have a say. It’s time you see that. It’s time you believe that.

And it’s time you start letting them go.

It’s time you stop fearing what bad effects losing control and power of your teenager will have. It’s time you stop believing that giving them any power and control is the guaranteed beginning of their failure as adults. It’s time you stop insisting that their lives need to swing the way you want them to. More than anything, it’s time you stop making your teenagers feel worthless in your attempts to do everything else.

If you can’t, and if they do enter the grown-up world feeling worthless, every decision they ever make will revolve around that worthlessness. What they do in school, their careers, in relationships, and with you. It will all be affected. It will all hinge on unhealthy perspective. Everything. Every decision. Every minute of every freaking day.

Last I checked, people who feel worthless don’t make a lot of great choices.

Dan Pearce, Single Dad Laughing

I’d be very appreciative if you’d take a second and share today’s post. You never know who will benefit or what kind of discussion and debate you will stir up. You just never know.

I’d also love to hear your thoughts, no matter what those thoughts might be.

NOTE: This post is the fourth and final in a series of posts that I have shared over the last seven months. If you haven't yet, please read the other three.

1. You just broke your child. Congratulations.

2. Worthless Women and the Men who Make Them

3. Worthless Men and the Women who Make Them

Between reading that, and being forced to listen to Miley Cyrus absolutely murder "Every Rose has it's Thorn" orginally by Poison, who were one of my favourite bands back in the 80s - i have been taken back to my teenage years this morning.

Arrrrggghhhhh.

On that note - Nicole and her friend Lydia and i are packing up the car and heading to The Mount for the long Easter weekend. Every single time i get to take my kids away on holiday to The Mount for free...i forgive my best friend Nicky for leaving me in Auckland all on my lonesome...that little bit more!

The girls think that they are going to sleep in a tent this time. I give them 15 minutes out there in the cold tonight, before they are banging on the door to be let inside!