After much consideration, this morning, i decided it was worth it to venture down to Pakuranga, to visit the local laptop fixer man. One hundred and twenty dollars later, i was back home, with a flash new keyboard installed on my laptop - minus all the crumbs that were stuck in the old one. I then proceeded to spend much of my day, reading the blog of the woman that Dr. Peter Jansen has threatened legal action against.
I had not paid attention to this story, and probably wouldn't have, had people not emailed me after hearing the tail end of what's his face's silly rant regarding bloggers, on his show yesterday. The closest i have ever come to having dealings with ACC are the forms that you fill in when your child requires stitches, or more recently when i managed to bang my tooth against the lid of my laptop which resulted in a chipped tooth. I have always just paid their surcharges, and then received a lovely letter in the mail a few weeks later, reminding me of the incident, by way of notifying me that my claim had been accepted. Sooo, any headline that has anything to do with ACC does not really jump out and grab my attention.
I am not sure what to think, after reading her blog. There is a lot of anger there, in some posts, and in some of the comments. ACC and Dr. Jansen are not the only people, or organisation that have been on the receiving end of her anger. It is also very clear though, that she is an intelligent woman, who possesses a fantastic sense of humour.
Part of me thinks that anger is understandable, if she has been the victim of child sex abuse. But then another part of me, as i kept reading, thought to myself - this woman is / has let something that happened so long ago, control her whole life for so long, and it is time for her to stop being a victim. It is time for her to stop empowering her abuser by spending so much of her life focusing on something that happened, that cannot be changed. It almost seems like her whole life is consumed by the subject. I can't help but wonder if she would just stop thinking of herself as a "victim" then maybe she would not require as much counselling as she thinks she needs? From what i understand she has already undergone ten years worth of counselling...if that hasn't worked then perhaps it is time for a different approach to her finding the happiness that it is clear has eluded her, so far in life.
I don't know. It's a tough one. That is not really why i am writing about this subject tonight though. I am writing about it, because i found the blog post in question, that Dr Jansen is threatening to sue her over, rather funny. There are a lot worse posts about him, throughout the blog, and it is obvious that this particular one, is just ...well...funny.
What is even funnier, is that none of us would have ever read it, had Dr Jansen not made his silly legal threat. I also found it rather amusing that it had been reported that she had been served legal papers, been contacted by lawyers, and been told to remove the blog post in question - while she states that none of that has occurred. I absolutely believe her regarding this, as i too have had it reported in the media that i was contacted by lawyers, and was going to be sued...oh sorry " i am definitely taking legal action...what that legal action will be, i don't know"...i think was what was said at the time haha...when i had heard absolutely nothing from lawyers, and the person who said that had spent the previous day begging, lying, and apologising to me.
The thing here though is this...she stated her opinion of her experience in dealing with Dr Jansen, on her own blog. If that is defamation, then isn't anything negative that is said about anyone on the internet also defamation? Of course when we read negative comments and remarks about ourselves anywhere...none of us are going to like it, or agree with them. Personally, i have just gotten used to it, and have learned to laugh at them - or even better - i just don't. Read. Them.
There are web forums and blogs galore, that are full of people trashing other people's 'reputations' ...my own included. You don't have to look any further than the Trademe Message boards to find people banging on about how much they dislike someone, and their reasons why. The only difference here, is that she is doing it on her own little corner of the worldwide web, instead of someone else's - which actually makes it less damaging because until Dr Jansen threatened to sue her - only about 15 people actually read her blog.
My big question here...is why has no one ever sued anyone over this kind of thing? Or have they, and we just haven't heard about it? I always thought that i was safe, because i have never lied. There is so much more that i could say, and that i know, but because it is not my first hand experience, but rather information that has come to me through 3rd parties, i don't write about it. I don't not write about it because i don't believe what i have been told. I absolutely believe the things that i have been told about a certain person. I don't write about it though, because i can't prove it, or i was not there to witness it, or experience it, myself....and i don't want to get sued. Maybe there is more to it than that though. Maybe you just can't sue someone for defamation, in relation to something they have said on the internet, and to threaten to do so just makes you look like a plonker?
Perhaps the moral of this story is to always take my Dad's advice that he gave me as a teenager, that i should have always listened to, but didn't until these last couple of years - Never do or say anything that you would not want on the front page of the newspaper. I have said it before, and i will say it again...that seemed like pretty extreme advice back in the 80s, but these days, it seems like our own names can end up being that front page of that newspaper, once someone types them into Google.
People don't just go around looking for someone to "defame" for no reason... Do good. Live a good life that you are proud of. Treat others not only how you would want to be treated, but also consider how THEY want to be treated... and i doubt any of us will have reason to cringe if we google our names. Seems too simple though huh? Maybe that is because it just... is.
I doubt that Dr. Jansen would have been the target of "Jax's" anger, had he done this. She might still be mad at ACC, but i doubt he personally, would have been in the firing line.
To "Jax" - Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong - only the weak cannot forgive. Truly forgiving might help you more than a million dollars worth of counselling. xxx
And finally - Whale Oil's advice is probably advice that we should all heed - NFWAB - Never F*ck With A Blogger! ;)